Tuning in…
Tuning in…
Castaway
1 appearance
A journalist known for her Observer column on modern women's lives, her 'slut' honesty, and teaching bedsitter cooking.
On the island
Eight records
Gavin knew where he was going, and I knew where I was going, and it was in the same direction.
Grande Valse Brillante in A-Flat Major, Op. 34, No. 1
I've always liked these Chopin walses, ever since my father used to play them on the piano.
He always used to cheer us up when we had a broken heart again, or when we'd split up with the current boyfriend. There was one particular tune he always played on these occasions...
Philharmonia Orchestra, conducted by Vladimir Ashkenazy
I have an abiding love for Finland and this is a bit out of Sibelius's Finlandia, which is also a favourite hymn.
Gavin and I didn't have the same musical tastes for the most part. He was a great jazz man and I preferred classics. But the bit in the middle was sort of Negro Spirituals and Cold Porter and so forth, and this Ella Fitzgerald was one that we could both play on the Coral Radio.
Concerto for Two Violins in D Minor, BWV 1043Favourite
Yehudi Menuhin and Georges Enescu, with the Paris Symphony Orchestra conducted by Pierre Monteux
Bath's sort of happiness is the lasting kind, it stands you in good stead when sort of more emotional stuff doesn't.
Violin Concerto No. 3 in G Major, K. 216
Arthur Grumiaux, with the London Symphony Orchestra conducted by Sir Colin Davis
After a couple of years, it's a welcome sadness you don't want to stop feeling what you feel. And this particular violin concerto of Mozart's says the things that you can't put into words.
Impromptu No. 4 in A-Flat Major, Op. 90
The last record is a cheerful one, because after all life does go on.
In conversation
Presenter asks
0:29Do you recall designing [your career and family life] that way, or was it something that simply happened to you?
No, I always thought I'd have a career, because it that was assumed in my family. … But also, in those days, one absolutely longed to find mister Wright. I never considered them to be alternatives. So you naturally wanted it all...
Presenter asks
3:20You couldn't have done any of it, had it all, if [your husband Gavin Lyle] hadn't been a kind of instinctive new man, could you?
He he was a Quaker, and I think that's quite important, because they've al always thought that women were in charge of their own souls … And he finally snapped, and he took me up to the top of Hampstead Heath, and sat me down on a bench, and said, This nonsense must now cease. Get a job And he never, so to speak, let me work. He wanted me to be whatever I could be.
Presenter asks
4:52You admitted to being a slut quite early on. Give me a broad definition of what you meant by that.
I started it by saying, have you ever pulled anything back out of the dirty clothes basket because it had become relatively the cleaner thing? And how many things are there in the wrong room cups in the bedroom and boots in the kitchen? And how many on the floor of the wrong room? And it had the most incredible response. People wrote in and said, Yes, yes, I'm a slut too.
The keepsakes
The book
A Short History of Nearly Everything
Bill Bryson
because I've had sixty years of other people's opinions and I'm sick of it. I want to finally master the facts.
The luxury
could I have a distilling machine to distill whatever was there with very clear instruction?
Presenter asks
13:31Did you feel that kind of pressure from your family [to get married], or the pressure to produce grandchildren for them?
Well, again, I my mother never once said when you're going to get married. She never once said when you're going to have a baby. But we were all looking for mister Wright, and I didn't get married till I was nearly thirty.
Presenter asks
25:22Did Gavin remain long suffering about this juggling act all the way through, or were there times when he said, Look, you know, this is too difficult?
I think he thought he shouldn't complain, and I think it was harder on him than I let myself realize. … I think he got a bit fed up with the number of extra things I added, you know, going on committees and going on boards and stuff like that. And I think that I probably wasn't alert enough to what he was necessarily going through.
Presenter asks
28:40You say that you've recovered better than most widows. What do you mean by that?
Well I think that in a sense I have a life of my own which could keep on keeping on. And I live in London where there's a lot going on, and some of the family are near, though one son's in California.
“Ever since then I've always known I was happy when I was happy, and not just later. And for years I could cheer myself up just remembering I wasn't there any more.”
“After a couple of years, it's a welcome sadness you don't want to stop feeling what you feel.”
“Well, for me it's the other way round. It's being so going as keeps me cheerful.”