Arthur English

Speaker 10:00

Hello, I'm Kirsty Young, and this is a podcast from the Desert Island Discs Archive.

Speaker 10:05

For rights reasons, we've had to shorten the music. The programme was originally broadcast in 1983.

Speaker 10:11

And the presenter was Roy Plumley.

Arthur English0:30

On our desert island this week is the actor and comedian Arthur English. Welcome ashore, Arthur. Have you ever daydreamed about being a Robinson Crusoe?

Presenter0:40

Not really, although my f first wife, when she was alive, we always spoke about finding a desert island, a paradise island, where we could just go and forget everything and live together. We always used to say that.

Presenter0:52

How much does music mean in your life?

Presenter0:55

Quite a bit really, although I don't sit listening to music too much, nor at at this moment in time, with my young babe, of course.

Arthur English0:59

But at this moment

Presenter1:02

I don't get a great deal of time she makes her own sort of music, but music's always been through our family and more particular now that I'm married to a uh a young lady who is interested in a ballet and of course she has an awful lot of records she's brought into the house.

Arthur English1:16

I don't remember ever having heard you sing.

Presenter1:18

No, no. I have a voice that would clear anything, uh any room at all. No, I've got no voice at all.

Arthur English1:20

Bye.

Arthur English1:25

Yeah. You never saw

Presenter1:25

Uh

Arthur English1:25

Bang it

Presenter1:26

In your act, in the music hall? No, no, that's the reason why in my act I always did that what we call jumble talk, just mad talk in the end, because I find that not so much now, but in those days, so many otherwise good comedians spoilt their act by trying to sing. There are very few Harry Seacomb, Alfred Marks, Dick Emery, they were able to sing at the end of the act, but otherwise I thought it was pathetic to finish their act with a good laugh and then say uh finish up with some dreadfully song no, I can't sing, I'm never going to try to.

Arthur English1:58

What's the first of these eight records you've chosen?

Presenter2:01

Well, the first one is obviously my life is show business, and one of the greatest performers in my book was Judy Garland. And we're talking about show business in my side of it, variety, which is traveling in the country, or was in those days, living in a trunk, living out of a trunk. So why not Judy Garland Sig in Born in a Trunk? From A Star Is Born. That's correct.

Arthur English2:01

Well

Speaker 22:23

I was born in a trunk in a princess theater in Pocatella at a hall It was during a matinee on Friday

Speaker 22:47

And I used a makeup towel for my dadi.

Arthur English2:54

Judy Garland, born in a trunk.

Arthur English2:56

Arthur, where were you born? Aldershot. Aldershot. Yep.

Arthur English3:00

Well, you made your great comedy reputation uh uh as an East End wide boy, I've always thought of you.

Presenter3:06

Everybody has, and up to this moment I've never said otherwise. Now, when I was a kid, nearly all the regiments in Aldricho, which of course is the home of the British Army, nearly all the regiments were London regiments. And I used to come home from school with the cockney accent, you see, because I was always at the camp.

Arthur English3:18

Uh

Presenter3:25

About school finishing time was the time they watered and fed the horses because it was all cavalry regiments ri near my school. And we used to go and chat to the soldiers, watching them feed the horses, and invariably there would be the horse breaking loose, and we as kids would run after them and bring them back and the troops would give us army biscuits. It was hard tack like they used to have in those days, that like those hard dog biscuits. And I used to flog them at school, I suppose. That was the start of the spin, a hate me a packet. And I would come home with this cockney accent and my parents would go spare, but thank God it was marvellous. Let's hear your

Speaker 13:34

Breed the horse.

Speaker 13:53

Well,

Arthur English3:58

Uh

Presenter3:58

Uh

Arthur English3:58

Oxham Hampshire

Presenter3:59

Yeah. Well, this is Hampshire, but broader down like that really. Like the spuds in Hampshire. Doesn't sound like your spiv at all. Well, no, exactly, exactly. No it wasn't really like my parents.

Arthur English4:08

But now it

Arthur English4:09

Yeah.

Presenter4:13

Your father was a

Arthur English4:13

Chocolate wasn't.

Presenter4:14

That's right, that's right. He was ninety two when he died. Uh

Speaker 24:18

Yeah.

Presenter4:19

Yes, he he was sixty five when I was born. In age he was a grandfather, but he was just a friend, a pal, a great mate. It wasn't father and son between my father and I, and this probably is why I I'm able to feel this way about my present marriage and my my child. But my father was um

Presenter4:37

Born in Choptnam.

Presenter4:38

And his father had a riding school with about a hundred horses where the

Presenter4:43

A bus station is now at Cheltenham, but I believe his father was

Presenter4:47

Well, he was a bit of a chaser in those days, and my father left home at the age of ten and ran away and went to racing.

Presenter4:54

Stables with Fred Archer. The legendary Fred Archer. That's correct. My dad and he were great pals.

Arthur English4:56

The legend

Arthur English4:57

The

Presenter5:00

And in fact, my father was in the room downstairs when Fred Archer committed suicide, which of course he tells us was through loss of weight and worry and and keeping his weight down.

Presenter5:12

Are you one of a big family? I have two brothers, just three boys. Actually, I'm the youngest of three. My middle brother is uh has died, but my eldest brother Walter is still alive.

Arthur English5:22

Did you go to school in Aldershot? Yes, indeed.

Presenter5:24

It western Borsco.

Arthur English5:25

What were you best at at school?

Presenter5:27

Oh, dear, oh Laura

Presenter5:29

Um

Presenter5:31

I suppose math was quite good for me. I was wasn't good at English, as uh proves that in later years. But uh I was doing a lot of concert party work and I I'm afraid my master used to call me the blinking owl,'cause I was always nodding off the sleep in the back row, getting in so late from concerts. How early?

Arthur English5:48

How early did you start doing

Presenter5:49

Whose concert party was it? It was called Five O'Clock Follies. My brother Walter, a chap called Sid Rule, Roy Fluenn, Reg Winter. The crowd of them had this concert going.

Arthur English5:49

Don't you aaron?

Arthur English5:52

Yeah.

Presenter6:02

And um

Presenter6:03

Sid Rawd, who ran it, used to do an acrobatic act with a young one of the brothers of the lady singer. It was just brute force really, and just lift him up and balance him on his hands and two days before the show this guy chickened out on my brother, love him, opened his mouth and said, I've got a brother, you know, so Arthur was into show business. You were being thrown about? Not half and

Arthur English6:24

You're being f

Presenter6:27

That was the very first show I can remember was at the Old Paris Hall in Aldershot on the 29th of October 1929. That was the first show and I was this little boy being lifted and thrown about and a few weeks later we were doing a show at Webben, which is a village near Aldershot and I was laying sort of horizontal across his head and he was spinning around and we hit the flats on the side, fell to the ground. He picked me up, put me across his knees, pretended to spank me and the audience laughed and so he said, from now on we've got a comedy acrobatic. Oh and it frightened the laugh out of me. It petrified me every time I was petrified to go and do this concert. I can imagine. My brother used to do monologues, Old Ward Oak, lavender trousers, I remember them all. And he was taken ill once and I said to this guy, I said, look, I know my brother's monologues and that's two acts. So I will do these two acts if I don't have to do the acrobatic. And that's how I got out of the acrobatic. Good. Let's have your second record. What next? Well, we're talking about show business again, which is my life. It's all I ever talk about. But in those days, I did have two people who were marvellous in my mind and strange enough in years to come. One actually managed me and looked after me, and that is Flanagan and Alan, and of course, Underneath the artist.

Speaker 27:42

Trains rattling by

Speaker 27:51

Fine men is a pillow.

Speaker 27:55

No matter where we stride

Speaker 28:01

Underneath the archaeologist We dream our dreams away.

Arthur English8:12

Flanagan and Allen underneath the arches.

Arthur English8:15

What was your first job? Obviously you you weren't making a living out of doing jobs in church halls.

Presenter8:20

Paul's first job.

Presenter8:23

Go I was a waiter.

Arthur English8:24

Really? Yes. Were you good at it?

Presenter8:25

Yeah.

Presenter8:26

No, no, no, it's a knockoff the trifle. Um officious hotel in Farnham.

Arthur English8:32

Yeah.

Speaker 18:32

Out.

Presenter8:33

And I got this job as a waiter and I went round to the second hand shops and bought, you know, odd trousers and and jackets. And the pantry my little pantry where I kept all the cutlery and things well the door led out into the dining room and there was a little hatch which led into the kitchen and the chef there made fantastic trifle.

Presenter8:52

And I loved it. And I used to sort of battle the hatch down and shut the door and I'd have three or four mouthfuls of this and then go and serve the people. In fact, it's one of the best trifles I've ever had, and it is my favourite now. I always make the trifle at home. So that's the one I always use. The fishers.

Speaker 18:55

Couldn't have a baby.

Arthur English9:03

Yeah.

Arthur English9:05

The Fischer's Recipe

Presenter9:07

That's right, yes, yes. The knocked off trifle. How long did that last? Well, until I had a fight with one of the bloke there. He was very silly, really, the the page boy, he was a s stroppy little devil and

Arthur English9:07

Ah yeah.

Arthur English9:09

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 19:09

Uh

Presenter9:17

So I hit him once and then um the the manager came up and I wanted to hit I was a silly fool in those days and I wanted to hit him. In the end I left and went back and my brother, who Jack, my middle brother, he went across and gave my notice in for me,'cause I didn't have the guts to go back and face him'cause he would have killed me, this fellow if he got hold of me.

Arthur English9:37

If it hadn't been for that fight you might have been a waiter at Fisher's Hotel still.

Presenter9:41

Well, I was offered the job of uh a valet for a chappie that worked down there, and the lady wanted me to go as her butler.

Presenter9:47

But no, I'm glad I didn't know.

Arthur English9:49

What did you do?

Presenter9:50

I went as an errand boy.

Presenter9:52

Because, you know, I knew what I was looking for.

Arthur English9:54

Delivering what?

Presenter9:54

Groceries

Presenter9:56

And that is when I met my first wife in the grocery shop. She had been the errand girl.

Presenter10:01

And then she moved into serving in the shop water stores in Aldershop. And then I came along as the errand boy and um she used to go out occasionally and get the orders from the various customers and I would do the delivery but we invariably used to arrange that I would meet her somewhere on the route and we would chat, have a cup of tea and whatever and that's where it all started, my first wife and I, where we met. How long were you in?

Arthur English10:23

Yeah. Yeah.

Presenter10:24

Yeah.

Presenter10:25

Oh, for some considerable time. And then I moved from there. I I became a grocer's assistant. And then of course by then we're into the war, you see.

Arthur English10:33

Now, these concert party jobs you were doing in the evening, were you getting paid? No, no, no.

Arthur English10:37

This was just for fun.

Presenter10:39

Yeah, I I mean they were getting paid, I mean very little, I presume, but I mean I never got anything no th they used it for costumes and things, but I never had money for it.

Arthur English10:48

Well, then the war came along you you joined up right away, didn't you?

Presenter10:51

Yeah, I was a second group of militia.

Presenter10:54

And I think my actual call up was sixteenth of November, nineteen thirty nine. But when the war came out I volunteered. I wanted to go into air crew, but they wouldn't accept me because I was already down for second lot of militia and went up in sixteen November. I went to the Isle of Wight, Hampshire Regiment.

Speaker 211:06

Mm-hmm.

Presenter11:10

Parkhurst, the IT theater was infantry training centre as it was then.

Presenter11:14

Uh A letter break

Arthur English11:15

For your third record, what shall that be?

Presenter11:17

Well, my third one is a is a very happy memory to me, and that was when for the first time I took my daughter Anne, who is now in New Zealand, I took her to Covent Garden to see Lisa Markova in Les Silphid. So I would very much like to hear a part of Les Sylphide.

Arthur English12:36

The waltz from Les Silphide, the National Philharmonic Orchestra conducted by Richard Bonning.

Arthur English12:43

You were in the army right through the war, weren't you? Yes, indeed, yes, right through. Only forty six. I came out with group twenty six. Did you do any entertaining in uniform?

Presenter12:51

About two hundred shows. As many as that? Yes, indeed, yes. Within three days of being in the army, I was doing a show at Parkhurst at the training regiment. In fact, I could have been there to this day because I was the comic, and every fortnight I did a show, but we all get clever, and it didn't last because the PRI officer there, Major Falkes, married a very young young lady from the ATS in his office, and they went on honeymoon. They came back, and he was the one that arranged the concerts. He was sitting in the front row, and I got very clever. I said.

Presenter13:28

We got a fellow who's just got married. I don't know his name, but he's a funny old guy. But he's about ninety. He got married to a girl of eighteen. It's like buying a book for somebody else to read. And I left the next morning. That was me out. Finished. I was too clever. And then I moved to the Ninth Hampshires and then they in turn disbanded and became the one five seven RAC. And then I went to the 143 RAC and I went to Lulworth Camp to take a tank gunnery instructors course. I was fortunate enough to come out what they call P one Plus, so I stayed there as an instructor to instruct instructors.

Speaker 113:38

Yeah.

Speaker 113:39

That was me out, finished.

Presenter14:06

I got into the concert party down there, so I did an awful lot of shows and uh until I finally left and came into Germany.

Arthur English14:12

Now when at length, after six years' service you would immobilize, what did you do?

Presenter14:16

Doug Road

Presenter14:18

I got a job as navvy down in Maidstone. That was the best you could find? That was all. You see, when I.

Presenter14:23

Joined the army, I was an errand boy or shop assistant. Well, you see, the point was, and it was very good that

Presenter14:29

People who had their careers interrupted were given training, uh rehabilitation when they came out the army.

Presenter14:37

And I badly wanted to be a draftsman'cause I I I'm useful. I've been to art school and sign writing and things like that.

Presenter14:43

But because I hadn't done it before the war, you see, I couldn't pick it up, they couldn't give it to me there, it was only that if he had been interrupted because of the war, so therefore I I could get nothing.

Presenter14:53

So I had to get what jobs I could. And uh I was married then and had two children. No, I had one child then.

Presenter15:00

So I got a job down in Maidstone, where my eldest brother lived.

Presenter15:03

The idea to become trained as a public works contractor, but it didn't quite work out like that. All I did was pick and shovel work. It wasn't very good, and I spent from about six o'clock in the morning to about six at night working. Then the rest of the evening I'd be looking around trying to find somewhere to live. And I couldn't get it because, you know, you couldn't have a house because I hadn't got enough children, and I couldn't have a flat because I've got too many children, and it was very difficult. Very great struggle. Then I came back to Aldershot and a cousin of my first wife's got me a job as a painter and decorator. I was pretty nervous about ladders, but that's what one had to do.

Speaker 215:34

Yeah.

Arthur English15:38

You were a painter and a decorator for quite a long time, weren't you?

Presenter15:41

Yes, right up until uh Wednesday, the sixteenth of March, nineteen forty nine, and it was raining, I tell you, it's so embedded in my brain. You're good on dates. What happened on that?

Arthur English15:49

Good on date.

Arthur English15:51

But

Presenter15:51

I tell you, I went to the windmill theater and had an audition.

Arthur English15:51

Day.

Presenter15:55

at ten o'clock in the morning and I was in the show at twelve o'clock.

Arthur English15:59

Well, they wanted somebody in a hurry.

Presenter16:01

They did actually. They did as it turned out. I thought it was because I was a genius, but, you know, no one's perfect. Yes, that's it. I went into the show the very same day.

Arthur English16:10

Now before we start talking about your show business career, let's see record number four.

Presenter16:14

Well record number four means an awful lot to me and it is La Vien Rose and I would like to hear Mantovani playing La Vien Rose. Uh

Arthur English16:22

Why do you select it?

Presenter16:23

because that was the very first tune I ever followed on the professional stage. At the windmill? At the windmill. On that first day? On that very first day, and for the six weeks that the season was on, six times a day.

Arthur English17:34

Mantovani and his orchestra, La Vie en Rose.

Arthur English17:37

Now, tell me, Arthur, this audition you did at the windmill, did they invite you to go? Had somebody seen you at one of your and at a concert?

Presenter17:45

No, actually no. Um I used to do a double act when I was going round the clubs and that uh there was a chappy called Johnny Current and I we did this double act. He did a single act, I did a single, so put three guineas we could put on nearly an hour's show between us.

Presenter18:00

And he came to me once and he said, Look, they do auditions every six weeks at the Windmill Theatre London, and I think we've got a good chance of getting into show business. And it's run by a woman called Vivian Van Damme at first. I know her. We knew we I thought it was a woman myself. But I never heard of the windmill.

Speaker 218:13

Yeah.

Presenter18:18

And so we wrote for this auditioner. He was in charge of the cleaners and the local bus depot.

Presenter18:23

And he said that we've got to be there at ten, but he said, I can't get off duty in time. I've written and told him we'll be there at eleven. I mean, when you think back, there you well, we turned up at eleven and Anne Mattel, who was the production manager of the women in those days, said, You're late, and he said, Well, that's all right. You said we could come at eleven o'clock. Now, what would you want us to do first? My single is single or the double act. Can you imagine? She said, I've got time for one act, do a double. So we go up, do a double act, finish it, and just look at each other. And they said, Right, thank you very much indeed. And that's all there was of that one. So we came home and my brother said, Well, why didn't you do your single act? And I said, Well, I didn't get an opportunity. Now, if I can just go back slightly, there was in those days you could go to these photographic shops, Jerome's, I think they were called, and you could have about half a dozen pictures done, rather like these machines now. And I had about a dozen of these done of me in this spiv thing that I was doing. and had given one to my brother, and he'd sent it in a letter to the Windmill Theatre, telling them that they should have seen my single act because the double act wasn't as good as the single. And Anne Mattell read the letter and she said to her secretary, Hazel, she said, Look, they can't keep coming up here for auditions. Just tell him no, I'm sorry, he's been here once, and that's it, and pushed the letter aside.

Presenter19:40

And then later she came back into the office. She said, Hazel, oh, look, I've told you once, we can't keep on. Tell him no.

Presenter19:46

And for a third time she came in, picked up this letter, took I've told you once, picked it up, and this photograph dropped out, and she said Have him.

Presenter19:54

And that's how I got the audition for the sixteenth.

Presenter19:58

It's as simple as that. Well

Arthur English19:58

So you auditioned Vivian Van Damme that morning and you were in the show later that day?

Presenter20:03

That's right.

Presenter20:05

I got a day off from work,'cause I was painting and decorating then from a place called Caesar Brothers, and I went up for the audition and

Presenter20:13

Anne Mattell came to me afterwards and said

Presenter20:16

I'm Anne Mattell, I'm the production manager. I don't think you're any good, but Mr. Van Damme thinks you might be. So will you change and see him? So I went downstairs, took the tie and the moustache off, came upstairs, saw

Presenter20:29

Vivian Van Damme

Presenter20:30

He said, Yes, lad, what do you want? I said, Do you want to discern? He said, No, I want to see the spiv chap. I said, I am the spiv chap. He said, No, no, no, no the fellow with the tash I said, Well, that is me. If it isn't, I'm living with his wife. He says, You're the fellow.

Speaker 220:41

Mm-hmm.

Presenter20:41

And that was it. And he said, Right, I want you to start today.

Presenter20:46

And I said, Today? He said, Yes, I'll book you day for day. I said, What do you mean book me day for day? He said, Well, I'll give you three pounds ten shillings for today, and if you're any good, you come back tomorrow and and so on. I said, Oh, that's no good to me. He said, Why not? I said, Well, I want security. He said, You don't get security in our business. What do you earn now? I know, I think it was five pounds ten and something in the winter and six pounds one and a tuppence in in the summer,'cause, you know, you had more time to work. And I signed a contract for those three days with the option of the remaining four and a half weeks, and I never ever signed another contract to him. On a shake of a hand, I stayed there for two years, and he raised my money every season.

Arthur English21:21

Now you talked about your spiv act. This is a good word of the immediate post-war years. A spiv was a sort of con man, wasn't he?

Presenter21:27

Yeah.

Presenter21:31

Yes, yes, yes. They said V Speev meant VIP backwards, but that's not quite right. But he was quite a VIP at at the time'cause while we were out fighting for king and country, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera, he was the guy who was using his wits and he could buy you anything from an elephant to a pair of stockings, a pair of nylons.

Arthur English21:36

Yeah.

Arthur English21:47

and the spur costume was wide shouldered,

Presenter21:50

That's right. Well I didn't know this. When I came out of the army I had borrowed from a theatre in Bielefeld in Germany a white jacket. I forgot I must send it back. And got this white jacket. And I've always wanted to be a sophisticated comic, me, I'm about as sophisticated as an Atom bomb, but with a black bow, white shirt, white jacket, black trousers, you see and a white trilby. Well I couldn't afford that so I borrowed some paint from the work and I got a black humbo with about sixteen coats of white paint.

Speaker 121:59

And uh got the point jacket.

Speaker 222:16

Yeah.

Presenter22:17

And that was my uh attire. And I did a concert in one of the clubs and somebody said to me, You are a proper spearfun. I said, What's a spearfon? He just explained like I've explained to you and uh he said he's got a little tash, a white trobies, sideboards, flash tie, big shoulders.

Speaker 122:25

Uh

Arthur English22:25

Into young

Arthur English22:33

Your ties got very flash and very big.

Presenter22:36

You see, when they said a flash tie, I said to my first wife, whose mother was an upholsteress, Get some material for mum and make me a flashy tie, a big tie. Well, she made a big tie, it was three feet long, went right down to my knees and I said, No, love, not me, I'm a sophisticated comic and I wouldn't wear it until the day I went to the windmill and that's what she said, I will come to the windmill with you if you wear the tie and literally

Presenter22:59

I've not left it off since, inasmuch as it is in my dressing room wherever I am. That's the one I had the commander for, so there were many ties across.

Arthur English23:06

Now at the windmill you did what, five shows a day, six shows a day. Wonderful experience because you could bounce off a rather tough audience.

Presenter23:10

Yeah.

Presenter23:14

Oh, completely. You know, I got the impression they didn't come to see me. Can't it be. And always the comics invariably followed the tableau, which was news or the ballet, where they had a news pose at the back. And when that finished, they would simply just vacate the seats and they would just climb over'cause I I nicknamed them the Windmill Commandos and they just climbed over the seats. Oh, they were brilliant. They could go five rows back and toss a briefcase into an empty seat and then fight for it. You could they really let our sex L. I'm awfully sorry, but.

Speaker 123:24

Yeah.

Presenter23:45

And I used to come on and see all this going on and say, I'll come back when you're organized and walk up the stage.

Presenter23:50

And it goes start again.

Arthur English23:51

So you had two years at the windmill? Yes, indeed.

Presenter23:53

Did you start broadcasting fairly early?

Presenter23:57

Oh, within about a few weeks of being at the windmill, yes. I was very fortunate because I came to BBC and did

Presenter24:04

A programme at Aeolian Hall, Look Who's Here. I I was the the sort of the warm-up comic and John Hooper was the producer and uh then he he said I I moved about too much, so they experimented with two mics and three mics and hanging mics and it was You used to work very, very quickly very fast, that was nerves, complete nerves, so that you talk fast. My first show was Look Who's Here and then Brian Sears came along and took me to Brighty Bambox.

Arthur English24:19

You used to

Arthur English24:30

where you had a big success.

Presenter24:32

Yes, that was great fun. That was six shows a day for six days a week at the Windmill and then every other Sunday was at the Variety Man Box.

Arthur English24:39

And then you went on the holes, of course, topping the bill?

Presenter24:42

Yes. Um this was a point, you see, coming into the Windwell as I did, and I had tremendous press within days of going into Windmill. And of course, Ken Bandy was the press man at the Windmill, obviously was working for the Windmill, but it had to become fifty fifty. So I got fantastic press, and it meant that I

Presenter25:00

came a professional performer, and I had to learn my business at the top of a bill which was very, very hard.

Presenter25:06

But I'm pleased to say there were very few

Presenter25:08

People about cu th you know, one or two try to cut the feet beneath you, but mainly they're a great bunch of people and help you tremendously. Record number five. Record number five is a record that I was given by my second wife when we were courting. I took her to the Albert Hall and she gave me a present. That was the very first present she's ever given me, and it is the Pig and Sweet Grieg, and it is in the Hall of the Mountain King. I would like to have.

Arthur English26:40

In the Hall of the Mountain King from Grieg's Pier Gynt suite, the London Philharmonic Orchestra conducted by John Pritchard. So you had this big success, Arthur, but of course there was a limit to the time that you could work the spiv. The spiv fell out of date, didn't it?

Presenter26:56

Yes, this was the thing, you know, whether I got rid of the spir first or he got rid of me, it was a very frightening thing, you see, because if I came on without the big tie, people sort of said, Where's the big tie? And if I did wear it, they sort of said, Oh god, not again, you haven't still got it. It was it was quite a dilemma. So, really, I what I did, I had an ordinary sort of suit, two-piece basically, with an ordinary tie, and wore my big tie.

Speaker 227:21

Yeah.

Arthur English27:21

Hmm.

Presenter27:21

I used to use the tash just the same, and I would come on, drop the tie, which was the mum mum they're laughing at me catchphrase, then say, I'm getting a bit old now, it's getting a bit heavy, take it off, throw it away.

Presenter27:33

And then I would carry on with the actual best of the two worlds, and it was basically them.

Speaker 127:36

Uh

Arthur English27:36

Yeah.

Presenter27:38

Not a spiv, but a a cockney, fast talking cockney pattern.

Arthur English27:42

But it did throw you for a bit. I mean, you lost your your big iron.

Presenter27:46

Oh, yes, yes, indeed, because half the jokes were built round the steel. I do agree with you. Yes, yes, yes.

Arthur English27:50

Mm-hmm.

Presenter27:51

So, I mean, it it was just another

Presenter27:54

Comic

Arthur English27:54

You had to stop and rethink. I believe you ran a shop for a while just while you were reorganizing yourself.

Presenter27:59

No, the the the the shop was for my wife more because, you know, she was on her own, the kids were off hand more or less and um it became a bit of a bore for her and she sort of

Presenter28:13

Well, I got a bit sort of bored and simple, and I bought this shop for her, basically. That was the the idea.

Speaker 128:15

Yeah.

Presenter28:21

Although uh I was going round, I wasn't doing my radio and I was I I was working, but not sort of I I think yeah, I see what you mean. Yes, it needed rethinking. Yes, yes, yes, yes. This would be about the time then that I started thinking in terms of getting away into plays.

Arthur English28:36

So you had a a good mixed success now. You weren't just a music hall performer, you were doing straight plays, pantomime of course, summer shows and uh eventually some

Presenter28:44

Would you come to share it with the mm-hmm?

Arthur English28:47

Comedy series on T V which did you no harm at all.

Presenter28:50

That's right, that's right. Well, I did uh lots of um odd things on T V, um Doctor in the House, uh, not in front of the children, but then came Follyfoot, which was the thing that started me into the acting side of it more, which was a children's series um, that was the Monica Dickens one. That's really set me up into the acting side of it as a slugger.

Arthur English29:16

And a slugger.

Presenter29:17

Uh

Arthur English29:17

And a series called The Ghosts of Martin Horn.

Presenter29:20

Luckily, oh, that's right, that was up in Granada, yes, with poor OQ Lawrence.

Arthur English29:24

Incidentally, you've seen a ghost.

Arthur English29:26

Yeah.

Arthur English29:27

Tell me about that. That was

Presenter29:28

During the war. That's right, that's right when we were in Germany, a place called Langenhorst, near the Dutch-German border.

Presenter29:35

An old school was where we were billeted and the guard room was at one end of the village, and right down the middle it was um a store room standing entirely on its own in its own ground. You could see right the way round it.

Presenter29:47

And I was on guard commander, and the bloke came up to me, and he said there's a lot of noise going on down in this some storeroom opposite the school, Sergeant. So I came down.

Presenter29:58

And you could hear goodness knows what going on, banging, crashing, and I put four blokes on each corner of this wall so they could all see round. And it was impossible. There there was only the one door where I was, and I sent for the orderly officer, and he came down and and nothing moved in or out of there, and the noise stopped. And he brought the key and we undid it, and there was just complete chaos inside there. And then with that, I went back to the guard room, and as I went to the guard room, it was Kerf, you remember, you see, in this village, and something walked across in front of me, and I rushed up to the part where it had gone, and it was a wall. And then over the side of the wall was the house, and a path alongside the house. And as I stood there, this object just rushed up across in front of me. Could you see what the figure looked like? No, it was just a figure. You know, you can't sort of say it was a Kerbala man, but they they said that the schoolmistress in the school there had lost her son in the panzers and he presumably was trying to get home, was the story that came out of that. But yes, I do believe in ghosts. And I've seen quite often but you never see I never see a ghost straight on, it's always sort of from the corner of your eye. You never really get a chance to to describe it, says sort of a being a beautiful lady with a head on her arm, anything like that.

Speaker 231:07

The

Arthur English31:21

Yeah.

Presenter31:21

No, I believe in being ghosts. I really do, and I can sense them. I can go into a place, and I'll tell you whether there's a ghost there. I really can.

Arthur English31:28

Well, we've got a bit off the track from talking about the ghosts of Motley Hall.

Arthur English31:33

Are you being served? Of course you've had a big success in.

Presenter31:36

Yeah, that's great. Still going. Still going. We've just finished the uh well, in the into the new series now, but we just finished recording it. Mm-hmm. That's right. That's great fun doing that one.

Arthur English31:46

Uh Each time we had another record, what's number six?

Presenter31:49

Well, the number six we was talking about uh meeting my young wife and we were married on the twenty-sevent of August nineteen seventy seven and the hymn we played was Morning Has Broken and that was what's happened to me. A new dawn came into my life on a new day and a wonderful new day.

Arthur English32:09

Domain

Presenter32:09

Yeah.

Arthur English32:09

Uh

Presenter32:09

At your wife in the theatre. Yes, indeed, at Wimbledon Theatre, in Mother Goose, in nineteen seventy six.

Speaker 232:17

The name has gone, my love was.

Speaker 232:42

They join us here.

Speaker 232:48

Rejoice of the

Arthur English33:16

Morning Has Broken sung by the Trinity Boys Choir

Arthur English33:20

Yeah.

Presenter33:20

So now, Arthur, you have two families? Yes, indeed. I've got a daughter of

Presenter33:24

Forty, she's in New Zealand, so she won't know I'm saying that. Uh son of thirty six and a daughter of two years and three months. It's what you call a Welsh Space family.

Arthur English33:33

A very well spaced family.

Presenter33:35

Yeah.

Arthur English33:35

Yeah.

Presenter33:36

And you'll keep busy?

Arthur English33:37

You're knowing of

Presenter33:38

Can you believe, yes, this is fantastic. Yes, I'm doing the part of Frost, the drunken jailer in Fledermaus at the Coliseum. It's uh this is really something I mean this is the ultimate.

Arthur English33:50

Yeah.

Presenter33:50

But the funny part about it is I've been in show business thirty-five years, I've done practically everything.

Presenter33:57

Apart from Bally, although I've done Cod Bally and Pantomime.

Presenter34:00

And now comes the ultimate. I go into opera.

Arthur English34:02

Very good.

Presenter34:04

No, and when I get there they say, Just be yourself and tell gags and I think well, where the devil have I been for thirty five years? What have I trained for? I've gone back to doing and libbin and

Presenter34:15

It's tradition in this Flay de Mouse for the jailer to be the local comic. This is the Viennaist idea.

Presenter34:23

Frankie Howard's done it, Clive Dunn's done it, and now they've asked me to do it.

Arthur English34:26

And you're enjoying yourself?

Presenter34:27

I'm loving it. I really am. The atrocious things I'm doing in the Coliseum of all places, it's sacrilege, it really is. But there you go. And I'm finding it such fun. And I mean the people in the opera, they are so wonderful, fun people, so full of life. It's lovely to be with them.

Arthur English34:34

Right.

Arthur English34:35

There you go.

Arthur English34:46

Arthur Regor No. 7.

Presenter34:48

Record number seven, of course, who I've pretty well introduced now, and that's something from Fledemouse, and that is uh Adele's Laughing Song, and I'd like the one where Elizabeth Schumann sings it.

Speaker 234:59

It is not to save me all

Speaker 235:07

Boop.

Speaker 235:22

Oh dishonke, he's a little bit of a musician, he's a little bit of a single.

Arthur English35:52

Elizabeth Schumann singing the laughing song from Johann Strauss's Fledermaus.

Arthur English35:58

Now how are you going to manage on this island? Have you got any skills that would be useful? I mean it'd be no good painting the place.

Presenter36:04

I'm a great do-it-yourself, man. I really am, yes, indeed. Can you fish?

Arthur English36:06

You are.

Presenter36:08

Uh

Arthur English36:08

Uh

Presenter36:08

I haven't got a patience for fishing, but people tell me I shouldn't do because it's a wonderful relaxation. So obviously, yeah, I'd have to fish.

Arthur English36:15

Would you try to escape? Could you build some kind of craft, and if you could, do you know how to handle it?

Presenter36:22

No, I'm the clue and I hate the water. I'm petrified on the water. I'm frightened of the sea.

Arthur English36:28

So you'll just make yourself comfortable on the island.

Presenter36:30

I think I would have to, yes, I think I really would have to because I don't like the boats. When I go on board I have to go down into the bar and Dover is a seven brandy crossing to me. And I lime my stomach.

Arthur English36:45

Write your last record.

Presenter36:46

My last record is eighteen twelve. The Tchaikovsky Overture. Tchaikovsky Overture, eighteen twelve, yeah, with the bells and the guns. I love it. Oh, it really does things to me.

Arthur English36:57

Which side are you on?

Arthur English36:59

Yeah.

Presenter36:59

Oh, I I don't mind the Williams side. I'll I'll settle up to us.

Arthur English38:03

The finale of Tchaikovsky's eighteen twelve overture, played by the Minneapolis Symphony Orchestra, conducted by Antole Dorati, with additional forces.

Arthur English38:13

If you could take only one disc out of the eight, which would it be? Oh, I think that one.

Presenter38:17

That one.

Arthur English38:18

1812.

Presenter38:19

Yes, I think so. It does something to me.

Arthur English38:22

And you're allowed one luxury to take with you, one thing of no practical use that would give you pleasure to have.

Presenter38:29

I don't know the only luxury if I was on a desert island weekend in Paris

Arthur English38:37

Well, for sheer cheek, Arthur, you shall have that. Thank you very much indeed. It's a lovely luxury. I hadn't thought of that.

Presenter38:38

Thank you very much.

Speaker 238:40

Uh

Presenter38:40

Bit

Arthur English38:45

and one book, apart from the Bible and complete works of Shakespeare, which are already there.

Presenter38:50

John Julius Norrich has written a book Britain's Heritage and being a great patriot, a great loyalist, a lover of my country.

Arthur English38:56

Right.

Presenter38:58

I would never get tired of reading about Britain.

Arthur English39:01

Britain's Heritage by John Julius Norwich. And thank you, Arthur English, for letting us hear your choice of Desert Island discs.

Presenter39:09

My pleasure, and thank you indeed for asking me.

Arthur English39:12

Goodbye, everyone.

Speaker 139:37

You've been listening to a podcast from the Desert Island Discs Archive. For more podcasts, please visit bbc.co. uk slash radio four.