Pamela Stephenson

Speaker 10:00

Hello, I'm Kirsty Young, and this is a podcast from the Desert Island Discs Archive.

Speaker 10:05

For rights reasons, we've had to shorten the music. The programme was originally broadcast in 1982, and the presenter was Roy Plumley.

Presenter0:31

On our Desert Island this week, we've marooned the actress and comedian Pamela Stevenson.

Presenter0:36

Pamela, are you a gregarious girl? Could you endure loneliness?

Pamela Stephenson0:41

I think so. I spend a lot of time

Pamela Stephenson0:43

when I'm at home, just being sort of solitary, because I I like that. It's very relaxing somehow.

Presenter0:49

What would you be happiest to have got away from?

Pamela Stephenson0:52

Well, I know that on my desert island I wouldn't wake up in the morning and pick up some newspaper and read a shock horror heading, you know, T V Pam in sex orgy with Siamese twins.

Presenter1:01

I thought they've never said that about

Pamela Stephenson1:03

Well, they say very similar things.

Presenter1:05

Now you bought eight discs that may have to last the rest of your life. Was that hard to choose?

Pamela Stephenson1:10

I'm just too young to do this program, Roy. I um

Presenter1:13

I thought that when we asked you, but we took a chance.

Pamela Stephenson1:15

We did it.

Presenter1:17

What's the first one on the list?

Pamela Stephenson1:19

May West. I love May West because she's so outrageous and for her time was extremely shocking and everyone got terribly upset about her and they jailed her for writing her own play, Sex, which apparently was as dirty as hell and and still would be, I suppose, to day. But she she laughed at herself. She was laughing at the whole business of sex and and being a sex symbol. She never took herself seriously, I think. I think she was wonderful. This is Love is the Greatest Thing.

Pamela Stephenson1:44

You cry for it, you sigh for it.

Speaker 11:48

Yeah

Pamela Stephenson1:48

Yeah

Speaker 11:48

Hello. In good King Arthur's time they used to die for it But when you get it, do you regret it? Well some girls do benefit It's often stated It's overrated A pleasure that grows tired once it's educated It may be risk

Presenter2:11

Okay.

Speaker 12:12

When it gets too frisky.

Presenter2:14

Uh

Speaker 12:14

Yeah.

Presenter2:14

May West, love is the greatest thing.

Presenter2:17

You're a New Zealander, of course, Pamela.

Pamela Stephenson2:19

I was born in New Zealand.

Presenter2:20

Hmm.

Pamela Stephenson2:20

Brought up in Australia.

Presenter2:21

When did you move to Australia?

Pamela Stephenson2:23

Oh, when I was four.

Presenter2:24

Your parents are scientists.

Pamela Stephenson2:26

Uh-huh.

Presenter2:27

Do you have brothers and sisters?

Pamela Stephenson2:28

Well, I have two sisters. One's in Australia. She flies aeroplanes and is also an architect, and the other one is an opera singer in Zurich.

Presenter2:35

Are they older or younger?

Pamela Stephenson2:36

No, they're both younger.

Presenter2:37

What were you best at at school?

Pamela Stephenson2:40

Being bad.

Presenter2:41

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson2:44

I suppose I was quite good at English. Um but I hated school and and I misbehaved most of the time. I was good at drama. I used to spend a lot of time trying to do plays.

Presenter2:46

That's

Presenter2:53

And you danced?

Pamela Stephenson2:54

Yeah, yeah.

Presenter2:54

Yes, sir.

Pamela Stephenson2:56

Yes, I I studied piano from when I was four.

Pamela Stephenson2:58

I found this a bit of a chore, actually. It's very sad, because although I've studied piano for about nine years, I can't play a damn thing.

Presenter3:05

He went to university to read Word.

Pamela Stephenson3:06

To read what?

Pamela Stephenson3:07

Well, in Australia you don't say read it. I was always very baffled by that when I came here. I thought it just meant you never took exams, you just read a lot.

Presenter3:15

No, so

Pamela Stephenson3:16

But I studied English and philosophy and drama and then got very frustrated with that because it was just you know, an academic approach and so I went to drama school instead.

Presenter3:24

And so

Presenter3:26

Did your parents approve of that, and and did they support you at drama school?

Pamela Stephenson3:30

They did eventually, I think.

Pamela Stephenson3:32

Early on they felt that uh

Pamela Stephenson3:34

I ought to get a degree. Something to fall back on in case I bombed out.

Presenter3:37

Are we?

Presenter3:40

What was your first professional job?

Pamela Stephenson3:42

Well, when I was twelve I came here for a year because it was my parents' sabbatical and I went to the arts educational school here just for a year because I was ahead of myself at school. So I actually danced with a festival ballet here in a nutcracker suite. Yes. That was really the first professional job. At the festival hall. Yeah. Yes.

Presenter3:55

And not crackers.

Presenter3:58

At the Festival Hall. Yeah. Yes. But grown up, what was your first time?

Pamela Stephenson4:03

Growing up I did a Tom Stoppard play. It was called Enter a Free Man and uh I played Linda in it. And that was in Western Australia.

Presenter4:10

Yeah.

Presenter4:13

And you did some red

Pamela Stephenson4:15

Yes. Although I was based in Sydney, I went to the Perth Playhouse in Western Australia, which was rather like going to to Birmingham Rep or something like that. Well, I suppose the standards are quite different, but um one has to be careful there. But yes, I did six plays there and then went back to Sydney.

Presenter4:31

Musicals?

Pamela Stephenson4:33

No, they were mainly comedies, actually, Enterfree Man was, and so was The Philanthropist by Christopher Hampton.

Pamela Stephenson4:39

I did one musical, which was Cabaret.

Presenter4:42

You were in Gypsy too.

Pamela Stephenson4:43

Mm, yes.

Presenter4:45

And the old tote. Now that's a very reputable Australian company, isn't it?

Pamela Stephenson4:46

Will that do?

Pamela Stephenson4:49

Yes, it is. Yes, I think it's disbanded now, but then it was, yes, yes. And and I did lots of major roles with that company. When when the Sydney Opera House opened.

Pamela Stephenson4:58

I played Polly Peacham in Jim Sharman's production of The Threepenny Opera there.

Pamela Stephenson5:03

And also Queen Isabel in Richard the Second. I was dreadful as Queen Isabel. I was appalling.

Pamela Stephenson5:09

The only people who who who were honest about it was when we had schools in, and they all used to laugh at me.

Presenter5:16

Anyway, it was good that you tried the whole spectrum. Sure. Let's have your second record.

Pamela Stephenson5:19

Twitter

Pamela Stephenson5:21

Well, I've only recently heard Peter Sellers' recordings. I found an old record at home called The Best of Sellers, and I genuinely thought that I'd discovered something that no one else had ever heard. I heard BALHAM GAY to the South and I thought this is great, no one ever talks about this, I've got to convert everybody. And I went, hey, I've just heard the most incredible record. Wait, you won't believe this. And everyone said, oh, that.

Pamela Stephenson5:44

But I was I um I met Peter Sellers the day before he died.

Speaker 15:48

Uh

Presenter5:48

Really?

Pamela Stephenson5:48

Yeah, and it was really traumatic because

Pamela Stephenson5:52

I was cast in his film, the the last film that he was

Presenter5:54

The one that you've gone.

Pamela Stephenson5:55

The one that he was going to make, The Romance of the Pink Panther, and it was to be the last of the Pink Panther movies.

Presenter5:58

That's

Pamela Stephenson6:01

And um

Pamela Stephenson6:02

I was unbelievably excited about it, and

Pamela Stephenson6:05

I was going to play a wonderful part, which would have been Fifty Fifty with Peter Sellers. A marvellous, marvellous part.

Presenter6:14

Balham, Gateway to the South.

Presenter6:18

We enter Balham through the verdant grasslands of Battersea Park.

Presenter6:23

And at once we are aware that here is a land of happy, contented people who go about their daily tasks in truly democratic spirit.

Presenter6:35

This is Busy High Street, focal point of the town's activity. Peter Sellers.

Presenter6:42

Pamela, you decided to travel I mean, travel a long way.

Pamela Stephenson6:46

Mm-hmm.

Presenter6:46

For a long time.

Pamela Stephenson6:47

Yeah.

Presenter6:47

Why?

Pamela Stephenson6:49

I think I was experiencing something that a lot of Australians feel, a kind of geographical isolation. You feel you're a long way, especially in the theatre, that you're you're doing European plays or American plays and you've never really seen those things being performed as they're performed in the original countries. So I thought, well, I I should take off and see these things for myself and and find out, then I can come back and blind everyone else with science when I get back.

Presenter7:12

Say they off round the world.

Pamela Stephenson7:14

Yes, I went round the world and um it set out to be just a very short trip. I thought I'd sort of do a woman's weekly world discovery tour, six you know, a six-week affair and it ended up being nearly nine months.

Presenter7:25

Which direction did you go in?

Pamela Stephenson7:26

I started in the Philippines and went up to Japan where I saw wonderful theatre in Japan, you know, very ancient theatre and and also modern theatre in Japan, and then down

Pamela Stephenson7:36

Through Thailand I'd al already seen quite a bit of Indonesia because I went to Bali on a previous trip, which I I enjoyed immensely, but I got stuck there because I fell in love with.

Pamela Stephenson7:46

With barley, so I didn't risk it that time. I went on, went sort of.

Pamela Stephenson7:51

through Thailand to India and then I went up to

Pamela Stephenson7:55

The Soviet Union and Poland East Germany.

Presenter7:58

Yeah.

Presenter7:59

What about language problems going to all these countries? Did it was discover that blonde hair is a kind of lingua franca?

Pamela Stephenson8:07

Well, sometimes there were great problems. I mean, particularly in in some countries. I mean, for example,

Pamela Stephenson8:12

In the Soviet Union, I found that intourists who were supposed to look after tourists in Russia were very unhelpful and they won't give you maps to go. And uh there was one occasion where I I wanted to go to the theatre. I had tickets to go to the theatre and uh I couldn't find out how to get there. I mean if there was a blizzard, it was minus thirty two degrees. And uh I went to intourist and said, How can I get there? and this woman just sort of brushed me off and said taxi and I said, where's the taxi? and she said outside, outside, hotel. So I went out the front of the hotel and looked for a taxi and I was expecting, of course, to see a large sign saying T A X I but all I could see was a line of three dark green cars outside the front of the hotel and I thought well must be taxi so I

Pamela Stephenson8:57

raced up and got in the front car and had my tickets with me and showed those to the driver and sort of pointed and and tried to i indicate that was where I wanted to go and

Pamela Stephenson9:05

I thought this guy was behaving a bit oddly, because he was bristling, and he had one of those large, imposing Russian hats on, and a great big moustache, and he was looking at me, and his eyes were nearly bulging out of their sockets, and he finally nearly turned purple and said

Pamela Stephenson9:19

Net taxi.

Pamela Stephenson9:22

I got out extremely quickly and found her I'd got into a military police car.

Presenter9:27

And they wouldn't give you a lift? That's very unreasonable.

Pamela Stephenson9:30

Is

Presenter9:32

Now this was

Presenter9:34

Pretty grim stuff. I mean, you're a a small lady.

Pamela Stephenson9:37

I'm a large five foot three Roy.

Presenter9:39

But it must have been a bit hairy sometimes.

Pamela Stephenson9:42

Well, yes, I I suppose it was. I mean, in the main, it was wonderful, because there's something about

Pamela Stephenson9:47

Being alone, you you just have to be brave, you have to take chances with people and you have to not be afraid. I became more gregarious as I was travelling because I felt that I had to be brave enough to sort of go up to people and say, Look, I've just seen your play, I'm an Australian actress, I don't speak Turkish, could you tell me what it was about? and people would be wonderful. But there were times, I mean, for example, I I caught the Istanbul Express between um Vienna and Budapest, and I'd always imagined that

Pamela Stephenson10:14

This would be a most romantic occasion because I'd seen that wonderful film with Marlena Dietrich of the prayer and she's standing on the the back of the carriage with her hands in prayer, heavily veiled, you know, shot through glycerin. And um it wasn't like that at all and and I was in an empty compartment at one point. I'd actually gone in there to sit there because I'd bought some coffee further up the train. It wasn't where I was sitting and while I was in there by myself a Hungarian customs official came in and sort of leapt on me, attacked me and it was very frightening. I ended up being knocked out because the train stopped suddenly and he knocked me against an ashtray which was on the side of the train and I was very frightened. But but

Pamela Stephenson10:54

Mainly, you learn to take care of yourself, you you learn not to do stupid things and put yourself in in crazy situations where you could be in trouble.

Presenter11:03

And eventually you ended up in Britain.

Pamela Stephenson11:06

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson11:07

Penniless Why, I've thirty quid in my pocket.

Presenter11:07

Pennyless

Presenter11:09

What was the first job you got?

Pamela Stephenson11:11

I got a part in a series called Space 1999 and uh I played a sort of

Pamela Stephenson11:16

Glamour Girl. I played lots of Glamour Girls at first because I that was really all I could get and and I thought it was just money to keep me going, you know, and then suddenly I realized that I I was here

Pamela Stephenson11:26

for a long time because I wanted to be here for a long time and and people seemed to like my work and it it it just started developing from there.

Presenter11:33

We're glad you stayed. What's your next record?

Pamela Stephenson11:37

Well Roy, this is the most tasteless thing I've ever heard in my life, and that's why I'm offering it to you. Thank you very much.

Presenter11:42

Thank you very much. I was hoping you'd say something like that.

Pamela Stephenson11:44

You could say something like that.

Pamela Stephenson11:46

I suppose it's not the most tasteless thing, but it's sort of so unexpectedly tasteless that it makes me laugh every time I hear it. It's particularly tasteless because it's the Andrew sisters, whom everyone always imagines sing about birds but boyids and and nice things.

Pamela Stephenson12:02

It's called The Good Time Girl.

Speaker 112:04

She may look clean like a living movie queen. Look out for the cook.

Pamela Stephenson12:09

A time girl.

Pamela Stephenson12:12

Though she talks real sweet when she's walking down the street Look out for the good time girl Heading the dance You may think you've found romance Cause she cuddles till your eyebrows

Pamela Stephenson12:27

She'll communicate as f ⁇ king.

Presenter12:28

Sore like you never saw before. Look out for the good time, girl.

Presenter12:35

Well, that's a different Patty Andrews and the Andrews sisters that we used to know and love.

Pamela Stephenson12:39

It's utterly yucky, isn't it?

Presenter12:42

Oh, just to tidy things up, it was.

Presenter12:46

The company of a New York musical called Over Here which played on Broadway in nineteen seventy four, and I don't know how long for.

Pamela Stephenson12:53

Not long after that.

Presenter12:55

Now, right, you are getting started in Britain. Bit parts in television, a film or two.

Pamela Stephenson13:01

Mm-hmm.

Presenter13:02

What about serious theatre? Did you try for the National and the Royal Shakespeare?

Pamela Stephenson13:05

Oh, I never thought I could make that. I mean, I ended up doing odd commercials and things too.

Presenter13:09

Which one?

Pamela Stephenson13:11

Well, I I was the German Avon lady. Don't for no for a while I had to learn to speak German exactly as the Germans speak it. I mean, in other words, I think they were doing it on the cheap here or something and

Pamela Stephenson13:22

And so I had to say over and over again to myself, Letts des Mer Zachen Simirch Solde mein algene of a tonen, wissen sie noch, I mean something like that.

Presenter13:30

I mean something about

Pamela Stephenson13:31

Something about I should do.

Presenter13:33

But but you didn't know what it meant.

Pamela Stephenson13:34

No, no. And uh I did silly advertisements for French chocolate and uh all kinds of silly things. And I suppose the work gradually got better.

Pamela Stephenson13:45

I did a play in Sheffield La Celestina. I did a television series for Thames called Funny Man.

Presenter13:50

Had you got, when you first arrived, what is known as an Australian accent?

Pamela Stephenson13:54

Ah, fresh off the banana boat, I was.

Presenter13:57

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson13:57

Yes, ice break like that.

Pamela Stephenson13:59

So?

Presenter14:00

Well, it's all gone, isn't it, miraculously?

Pamela Stephenson14:03

Well, I had to work on it, Roy, because after all no one was going to give me a job sounding like that, particularly since I kept steaming into offices of B B C people and suggesting they gave me a job as an English rose. I thought I was perfectly suitable, but they just laughed.

Presenter14:16

Oh, that's unfair.

Presenter14:19

Let's have another record. What have we got next?

Pamela Stephenson14:21

Well, um when I I was um asked to audition for Pirates of Penzance that I'm in at the moment, I first of all thought they was ridiculous,'cause I'd heard the record of Linda Ronstadt singing it on Broadway and I thought she was marvellous and uh I went into the audition and said, Now, listen, I am no Linda Ronstadt. Well, why me? and they said, Well, w we think you can act it.

Pamela Stephenson14:40

Uh and I said, Fine, it would be great fun and then embarked on a a period of work to try and add seven notes to the top of my range, which was a a difficult thing to do in a short time. So I went to my singing teacher, Ian Adam, and said, Help and he said, Fine, I'll d I'll give you some exercises. And it just happened that I was about to go away on holidays for four days to the Canary Islands. Actually, it was the only holiday I had last year in between the series of Not the Nine O'Clock News and when we started the stage show, Not in Front of the Audience.

Pamela Stephenson15:07

So, um, Ian said to me, I'll give you the record of the greatest singer that there's ever been.

Pamela Stephenson15:13

And because you're a great mimic, you might be able to copy her voice, and and and you'd be wonderful if you could do that. And I said, Great, um who is she? and he said, Louisa Tetrazzini. I said, Oh, fine, I've got four days.

Speaker 115:24

Ha ha.

Pamela Stephenson15:25

So there I was. I found myself in this curious sort of moon village. It was a Swedish holiday resort. At sundown, when they thought they were about to have some peace and quiet, I would sit out on the terrace and try and imitate Tetrazzini. I hate to think what it sounded like.

Presenter15:40

So Madame Tetrazzini is on your next disc.

Pamela Stephenson15:43

And she's singing uh Anon Junje.

Presenter15:47

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson15:47

From La Sinambula.

Presenter15:48

What does it mean, the title of this aurea?

Pamela Stephenson15:50

I haven't a clue.

Pamela Stephenson16:33

If we did your pump

Presenter16:37

Even your fan ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba.

Presenter16:53

Tetrazzini, singing an aria from La Somnambula by Bellini. When I saw you in Pirates of Penzanza after your first number, I said, That girl sounds like Tetrazzini.

Presenter17:03

That's such a

Pamela Stephenson17:05

They're such a liar

Presenter17:07

Not the nine o'clock. A sort of review.

Pamela Stephenson17:10

Yes.

Presenter17:10

Sketchiest, songs, point numbers, impersonations.

Presenter17:14

Where had you been doing that sort of work?

Pamela Stephenson17:16

I hadn't really

Presenter17:16

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson17:18

The thing was, though, that I'd done a lot of

Pamela Stephenson17:21

Characters

Pamela Stephenson17:22

You see, when I was at drama school in Australia it was actually quite a good drama school, I think. It gave me very good training because they refused to allow me to play any part that was anywhere like what I'm like or that resembled my physical shape.

Pamela Stephenson17:36

which meant that I was always playing old ladies or strange

Pamela Stephenson17:41

drunken whores or I mean, weird people. I mean, I I ended up leaving drama school totally unable to play an ingenue.

Pamela Stephenson17:49

But it was very good for me, and I tended to play lots of very different characters all the way through.

Pamela Stephenson17:54

Plus the travels during the travels I saw a great deal of political theatre. That's actually what I became the most interested in. For example, when I was in Poland, in Warsaw, I saw

Pamela Stephenson18:06

Marvelous cabaret theatre then. I spent a lot of time watching some performers at Brecht's theatre, the Berlin Ensemble, rehearsal periods there too, and I think that probably did it. A lot of it was comedy, so much of it was political comedy.

Presenter18:19

The splendid talent you have for impersonation. Was that something you knew you had or or did you work on it for a show?

Pamela Stephenson18:25

I didn't know I had it. It happened by accident. I think during the very first or the second show or something I was called upon to play a newsreader.

Pamela Stephenson18:34

Well, I did a newsreader, and everybody suddenly said, Who's the

Pamela Stephenson18:38

No one else it's Angela Riffin.

Pamela Stephenson18:41

And so they thought, Well, we'll put a wig on her and see if she can do the whole thing and I and I did. And I thought that was it. And so I tried to do Anna Ford, and each one I thought I'd never be able to do the next one. But for some reason I just learnt to do it more and

Presenter18:55

Did you supply much of your own material?

Pamela Stephenson18:58

Not very much, no. I think the team's writing was mainly in rewriting, you know, in working on scripts which had already been written.

Presenter19:08

How many series did you do?

Pamela Stephenson19:09

Four, I think.

Presenter19:10

Well well, however many there were, it was a great success and the not the nine o'clock news certainly established you and got you very much in demand.

Pamela Stephenson19:18

Yes, indeed. It was great fun.

Presenter19:21

At which point let's break for record number five.

Pamela Stephenson19:24

Oh, I can't make up my mind.

Presenter19:26

My

Pamela Stephenson19:27

Randy Newman, it's either got to be tickle-me or lonely at the top.

Pamela Stephenson19:31

And I'm waving my finger now and it's tickle me.

Presenter19:35

Tickle me, right.

Pamela Stephenson19:38

There's nothing else to do.

Presenter19:43

Yeah.

Speaker 119:43

You won't have to talk to me and I won't have to talk to you.

Presenter19:52

When we done out

Speaker 119:52

Got out Michael Saw Nothing else to do.

Speaker 119:58

Why don't you tickle me?

Presenter20:06

Randy Newman, tickle me. You did a one-woman show at Edinburgh. That must have been rather a challenge.

Pamela Stephenson20:14

Oh, I've never experienced such panic in my life. I used to be so sick before I went on stage. But, um, it was great fun. It was

Pamela Stephenson20:24

It was because I'd done a series of Not the Nine O'Clock News and I felt the need to develop my own material as separate the Not the Nine O'clock News material. So I arranged this theatre and and got some material together and did a an hour show and uh it was the f my first attempt at stand-up comedy and I did an hour like an idiot because that's a a terribly long time to do. It was great fun though and the nights that it worked it was terrific and the nights that it didn't work it was horrible.

Presenter20:46

It was it was

Presenter20:52

Now, your first appearance in a West End theatre, you got mixed up in a a rather curious entertainment, I thought a reading of a verse play by Clive James.

Pamela Stephenson21:01

Mm-hmm.

Presenter21:01

Tell me about it.

Pamela Stephenson21:03

Mixed up, honestly, Roy.

Presenter21:06

Uh

Pamela Stephenson21:06

Charles Charming's Challenges on His Pathway to the Throne. That's the title I was trying to think of.

Presenter21:10

That's the title I was trying to think of.

Pamela Stephenson21:15

It was a bit like facing a firing squad on opening night, because a lot of people were gunning for Clive.

Pamela Stephenson21:20

I don't know how he feels, but

Presenter21:22

It gave you a chance to do some very good vocal impersonations.

Pamela Stephenson21:23

Good job.

Pamela Stephenson21:26

Yes, I mean it was quite different to not the Nine O'Clock News because um they were only vocal impersonations. I didn't have time, it being the theater to change um visually. But um it it was great fun. Russell Davies was marvelous. He did very good impersonation. I actually only only did a few. I mean it was quite a small

Pamela Stephenson21:41

role for me. I did lots of members of the royal family which I'd never done before, and it was quite interesting'cause I was doing and quite a challenge. I was doing Princess Anne and and the Queen and the Queen Mother and the Duchess of Windsor and and they really have a very similar sound to them all, those people, and one had to

Pamela Stephenson21:58

Try and sort out the

Presenter21:59

The differences

Pamela Stephenson22:02

Uh Pink Floyd. Um I've I've always been a a great fan of Pink Floyd.

Pamela Stephenson22:06

I was trying to think about records which have stayed in my mind over the years. This is difficult for me because I'm a very fickle person and keep changing my mind about what I like, but

Pamela Stephenson22:16

Pink Floyd has stayed, particularly the Dark Side of the Moon.

Pamela Stephenson22:20

The London

Presenter22:21

Teeth is in my head.

Presenter22:27

Go

Speaker 122:28

Unity is in my head.

Speaker 122:34

Here is the blade.

Speaker 122:38

Yeah.

Presenter22:38

You make the change.

Presenter22:42

Do you rearrange me till I'm sane?

Presenter22:48

Brain Damage by Pink Floyd

Presenter22:51

Now, one way or another you've been very much in the public eye. You've had a vast amount of publicity.

Pamela Stephenson22:57

Hmm.

Presenter22:58

In fact, you've had to wear disguises to avoid the press and all that sort of thing. How do you react to it?

Pamela Stephenson23:04

Well, it's really a threefold thing. I mean, on the one hand, for example, last year I was having personal difficulties and

Pamela Stephenson23:12

These were made more difficult by the fact that the media was was watching and commenting all the time, and one felt one was a sort of test case for the Schrödinger principle, i.e. the fact that the press were watching were affecting the situation itself, and that it was difficult to experience it truthfully, you know, to have sort of honest emotions about really quite traumatic events. And I think the worst thing is that um so often

Pamela Stephenson23:38

And this was particularly true of my my private life last year. The things that were being said in the press didn't just affect me, they actually affected a lot of other people. They're actually very hurtful to a lot of other people.

Pamela Stephenson23:49

and, you know, well, there were children involved, and and that makes it sort of ten times more difficult. So there was that side of it. Then there's the side of it which is that I am actually quite an outgoing sort of

Pamela Stephenson23:58

person and and I and I do show off from time to time and and I like having fun and if I do outrageous things in public places I know at the back of my mind that it's going to be written about but it's very hard for me and I don't want to change my personality and just become a sort of mimsy boring person just for the sake of not getting yet another piece of coverage about you know something and and then there's the third thing which is that you know if one's a performer

Pamela Stephenson24:22

I feel that you want to publicise work that you do. It's important, it's expected of you by the management.

Pamela Stephenson24:27

And, you know, it it there's a professional thing. And at the one hand, one

Pamela Stephenson24:33

wants publicity for certain things, at the other side it gets too much, and it's it's very difficult to control. I have a very ambiguous attitude to it, and and I I I I can understand that people must be very baffled about what exactly I really am. But I I don't like being accused just of being a shallow publicity seeker, because that that's that's not true.

Presenter24:52

Hmm.

Pamela Stephenson24:52

On the other hand, I am a bit of a show off.

Presenter24:56

At one point you disguised yourself as a granny, I believe.

Pamela Stephenson24:59

Oh, well, there were some very funny events last year, and and because I'm getting further away from it, I I can see it in more perspective. I mean, um, at one point it was ridiculous, because my house was being besieged night and day by the press. Now, I know this happens to a lot of people, but it is quite a bore because you you can't do normal things, and they were having parties on the street outside, and the neighbours were complaining, and so I ran a rubber hose from the garden through to the upstairs window, and and, you know, if if someone were to come to the door, then I'd quickly look out the window to see who it was, and if it was press I'd give the signal, and water would be poured on their heads, and I tape recorded conversations of press who were standing on the doorstep, and

Pamela Stephenson25:35

And at one point I had to um get out of the house. I I desperately wanted to go somewhere, but I couldn't get out without being photographed, and what I was trying to avoid was yet another picture, you know, with T V Pam in tears all over the dailies. So

Pamela Stephenson25:49

I climbed over the back wall to a neighbour's place and borrowed um I've got lots of wigs at home, but this woman happened to have a grey wig, and I borrowed this grey wig from her and an old cardigan and a pair of, you know, horrible old shoes, and I ended up climbing over my back wall disguised as an old granny.

Pamela Stephenson26:07

And I nearly broke my bloody neck because I didn't realize how far it was down to the street.

Presenter26:10

Yeah.

Speaker 126:10

Alright.

Pamela Stephenson26:13

Um but I was shuffling along the back alley and there were actually photographers and journalists standing guarding the way to the alley.

Pamela Stephenson26:21

And I had this desperate desire to break into a canter.

Pamela Stephenson26:28

But I I knew that the game would be up, so I had to continue to limp along this street. And it seemed like nine years before I got to this I got right up to them, walked straight past them, you know, in this disguise and and just kept limping all the way, you know, up the next street and finally managed to get into a a cab and and went to where I I wanted to go.

Presenter26:48

We finally managed to get in

Presenter26:53

And did you find the journalist gave you a more sympathetic press after you had sprayed them with water?

Pamela Stephenson26:57

This is the problem, Roy. You've put it in a nutshell, but you've got to fight back somehow.

Presenter27:04

Let's get back to music. Number seven we got to.

Pamela Stephenson27:07

Oh, now, here's a sick boy. This boy is not well.

Pamela Stephenson27:12

Um I particularly w wanted you to to do a late night version of this programme because unfortunately a lot of my favorite records are unsuitable for um transmission, I understand, at the time this programme's going out.

Presenter27:26

Got better at three in the morning.

Pamela Stephenson27:28

Well, I think my favorite stand up comedian is probably Richard Pryor, whom I admire enormously. And uh I love him because he tells the truth and he laughs about very serious events that happened to him, something I try to do all the time and find rather difficult. The favourite things that I like about him is a piece he does about his own heart attack.

Pamela Stephenson27:46

And I mean this must have been a terrible experience, but he makes it incredibly funny.

Pamela Stephenson27:50

Um but of course Richard Pryor uses a hyphenated word beginning with mother in every two seconds, so we can't play him. But Steve Martin I I like very much also, and I've seen him perform live, like him very much, and and this piece is called Cat Handcuffs.

Speaker 328:03

How many people have cats?

Speaker 328:06

One, two, three, four. Okay, ten. Now.

Speaker 328:10

Let me ask you this.

Speaker 128:10

Let me ask you this.

Speaker 328:12

Do you trust them?

Speaker 128:12

Do you trust them?

Speaker 328:15

Because I've got to get a pair of cat handcuffs and I gotta get'em right away.

Speaker 328:20

Just the little ones that go around the little front paws.

Speaker 328:23

Or maybe the manacles of four that get all four paws, but

Speaker 328:28

What a drag, I found out my cat was embezzling from me.

Speaker 328:32

You think you know a cat for ten years? He pulls something like this.

Presenter28:35

Steve Martin, Cat Handcuffs.

Presenter28:38

Pamela, you've been to a lot of places. I'm sure you picked up some ideas that would be very useful on a desert island. Australia, for example. I mean, you should have some ideas on how to build a hut.

Pamela Stephenson28:48

I think I'd be quite good at improvising when I got there.

Presenter28:50

Ever done any fishing?

Pamela Stephenson28:52

Yes, I have. In New Zealand a long time ago. I'm not terribly keen on it these days.

Presenter28:57

Would you try to escape?

Pamela Stephenson28:58

I'd give it a while, and then I'd yes, I'd try to escape.

Presenter29:02

Let's have your eighth record.

Pamela Stephenson29:04

There is a part of me that really, really likes peace and quiet.

Pamela Stephenson29:08

Um

Speaker 129:08

No there isn't if there isn't channel

Pamela Stephenson29:10

That's fine.

Pamela Stephenson29:12

Hmm.

Pamela Stephenson29:14

I I told you I was living in Bali.

Pamela Stephenson29:19

And um I had a lovely time there and I got to really like hearing the sound of the Gamelan orchestra.

Pamela Stephenson29:26

I was very lucky because when I arrived in a a village where I stayed, a village called Pliatan, I happened to hit on the beginning of a very important festival, so that there was a great deal of

Pamela Stephenson29:36

dance and and music and mask plays and things going on at the time and

Pamela Stephenson29:41

I used to have dinner and then every evening after dinner walk a couple of miles into a monkey forest with sand flies sort of lighting the way.

Pamela Stephenson29:49

and then there'd be a a large gathering of Balinese people and and they'd perform until dawn. And they're amazing performers. And it taught me a great lesson really because in Australia I was mainly doing sort of European or American theatre and most people in Australia at that time weren't worrying too much about Australian playwrights and it seemed

Pamela Stephenson30:09

The Balinese were performing so naturally. You know, there were rice farmers in the daytime and they were performing at night. It was all terribly.

Pamela Stephenson30:16

Um organic. Not a word I like to use, but you know what I mean.

Presenter30:21

What is the Beza music that you're going to play? Is it is it a dance music?

Pamela Stephenson30:23

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson30:24

Yes, it's a lei gong. It's actually a dance that's done by um young girls.

Presenter31:30

Some Balinese music, and I think you'd better de-announce it, Pamela, because you know how to pronounce it all.

Pamela Stephenson31:36

Well, it was the legong craton, or as Angela Rippon would say, the legong craton.

Presenter31:43

Thank you. And if you could take just one disk out of the eight tuple platus, which would it be?

Pamela Stephenson31:49

This is so sadistic of you. Um, I think it would probably be the Legong funnily enough. It it it I

Pamela Stephenson31:55

Probably I wouldn't play anything. I mean, how do you get ashore with the record player in any case?

Presenter31:59

Don't let go of the water.

Presenter32:02

It's a certain air of magic comes into all this. And one luxury to take with you, one object which gives you comfort, to have, pleasure, to have, and it's of no practical use.

Pamela Stephenson32:12

Ah well, you mustn't accuse me of cheating on this, but I'm afraid with the advancement of technology you're running into a bit of trouble, because I fancy a television set, but with a satellite link up, so I could get television from anywhere in the world.

Pamela Stephenson32:24

Uh

Presenter32:24

That's all right, I can't complain about that. And you'd have solar batteries to run the machine on.

Pamela Stephenson32:29

Absolutely.

Presenter32:30

Right. And one book apart from the Bible and Shakespeare which are already there when you arrive.

Pamela Stephenson32:35

I take the Dhammapada, the Buddhist scriptures.

Presenter32:38

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson32:39

It's full of very simple truths, I suppose, which

Pamela Stephenson32:44

I think it would be very comforting on a desert island. Unlike most holy scriptures, so called holy scriptures, it doesn't pretend to be.

Pamela Stephenson32:52

Oh, dear, pretend. Well, we're into a philosophical discussion there, but uh it doesn't it's not supposed to be the word of God, it's it's supposed to be the word of an enlightened human being, which for me ma makes all the difference.

Speaker 132:55

Glass off.

Pamela Stephenson33:04

And um I think I could it's just very difficult for me to be serious in public.

Speaker 133:10

Why the

Speaker 133:14

Ha ha ha. Uh

Presenter33:15

Haha.

Speaker 133:15

Ha ha ha ha ha.

Presenter33:15

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Speaker 133:17

Ah.

Pamela Stephenson33:18

Okay.

Presenter33:18

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson33:19

Uh

Presenter33:19

Yeah.

Pamela Stephenson33:19

Yeah.

Presenter33:19

Uh

Pamela Stephenson33:19

Uh

Presenter33:19

Collapse of Blonde Party.

Presenter33:24

Well, thank you, Pamela Stevenson, for letting us hear your Desert Island Disc.

Pamela Stephenson33:29

Roy, I'll take you with me.

Speaker 133:31

Yeah.

Speaker 133:43

You've been listening to a podcast from the Desert Island Discs archive. For more podcasts, please visit bbc.co.uk slash radio four.