Marti Webb

Speaker 20:00

Hello, I'm Kirsty Young, and this is a podcast from the Desert Island Discs Archive.

Speaker 20:05

For rights reasons, we've had to shorten the music. The programme was originally broadcast in 1982, and the presenter was Roy Plumley.

Presenter0:31

This week our castaway is the actress and singer Marty Webb.

Presenter0:35

Marty, how well could you put up with loneliness for a long time?

Marti Webb0:39

I think I'd have to cope. I think I would cope because I mean there's nothing much else to do. I mean you can't sit around feeling sorry for yourself for very long.

Presenter0:45

Do you think this miserable alliance of eight disks would help a lot?

Marti Webb0:49

It would help a lot, I'm sure. It would help more if I had more discs.

Presenter0:52

Was it hard to choose?

Marti Webb0:54

Very hard. I think it is for everybody that says that to you, I'm sure. But it is.

Presenter0:56

There's that.

Presenter0:58

What's the first one you've got there?

Marti Webb0:59

Tchaikovsky, actually. It's the um

Marti Webb1:02

Number one in B flat minor, but it's the last part, because it's the last part that I really like.

Presenter1:06

The piano concerto

Marti Webb1:07

Yes, that's right.

Presenter1:08

Uh

Marti Webb1:08

By Richter and Boncarian Conducting.

Presenter2:12

The closing passage of Tchaikovsky's first piano concerto

Presenter2:16

with Richter as soloist and Herbert von Karian conducting the Vienna Symphony Orchestra.

Presenter2:23

Now, I know you're from North London, Marty. What part?

Marti Webb2:26

North West Ashley, Wolsdom Green.

Presenter2:27

Any theatrical or musical talent in the family?

Marti Webb2:30

And my father played the violin and my mother played the piano and sang a bit. And um that's all. I mean no one connected with the theatre in any way.

Presenter2:38

You began dancing very early, didn't you?

Marti Webb2:40

Yes, when I was about four, I suppose I went to my first dancing class.

Presenter2:44

Did you show exceptional promise?

Marti Webb2:46

I believe I did then. Since then, I wouldn't say I do, but uh yes I did when I was very young and I wanted to be a ballerina.

Presenter2:49

Yeah.

Presenter2:52

Were you taken to the theatre a lot as a child?

Marti Webb2:54

Yes, I I did, actually. I went to variety shows more than I went to plays or musicals when I was very young. But then I sort of progressed as I got older to go to a musical theatre much more.

Presenter3:04

And the cinema, of course.

Marti Webb3:05

Oh, yes, I always went to the cinema every week.

Presenter3:07

Whose decision was it that you should go to a stage school?

Marti Webb3:10

My mother my mother wanted to put me to stage school because um

Marti Webb3:14

We were actually talking to a teacher at my own school, an ordinary school I went to, not a stage school and she thought that I should go to stage school as I was always having classes for dancing, and if I went to a stage school course I would have that as well as my education. And so she arranged for us to have an interview with misses Foster at the Addie Foster School.

Presenter3:30

How old were you when you went?

Marti Webb3:31

Just twelve.

Presenter3:32

And I think it was the following year that you went to audition to a Discovery show.

Marti Webb3:38

That's right, for Carol Levis Junior Discoveries.

Presenter3:40

Did you get the job?

Marti Webb3:42

Yes, I did, and uh I sang Musetta's Wall Song on television, and then they asked me to come back, and I was going to sing Oh, My Beloved Father.

Marti Webb3:50

And I had a terrible cold, I remember that, and really I was so stuffed up you could hardly understand a word I was singing. So I ended up singing um Waltz of My Heart by Avnavella for the Dancing Years, which actually sounded all right in the end. I was most surprised.

Presenter3:59

For the dawn

Presenter4:00

Which actually

Presenter4:02

But you had this enthusiasm for opera. Was it your intention, your ambition, to sing that sort of music?

Marti Webb4:08

Oh, no, I mean I j I just that I had that sort of voice. And so, um, at school they gave me songs like that to sing and I sung them'cause I quite enjoyed singing them.

Presenter4:15

Here

Marti Webb4:17

I wanted to be a dancer, but of course naturally I at a school like Ada Foster's they make you do everything that You know, they think you can do well, so I could sing, so I sang. But I

Marti Webb4:26

I didn't want to be an opera singer now. I mean, I don't think I'd ever study hard enough to be that.

Presenter4:30

Did you do any work while you were still at the Edo Foster school?

Marti Webb4:33

Yes, I did my first show when I was um fifteen, and that was Vivian Ellis's Listen to the Wind.

Presenter4:38

A children's play.

Marti Webb4:39

That's right. So I did that for six weeks and then went back to school again. And then my next job was I mean, I did televisions like playing Screaming Teenagers and series and things like that, you know, those are those sort of little things. And then I did um Stop the World when I was seventeen. And then I actually left school while I was doing the show.

Presenter4:50

Okay.

Speaker 24:50

Uh

Presenter4:56

Well, let's break at this point for your second record. What's that?

Marti Webb5:00

Maria Calla singing Una vocha pocofar from the Barber of Seville.

Presenter5:03

And why do you choose this?

Marti Webb5:05

Um because I I I love her singing anyway. I think she's quite an amazing colotura and um I like to sing along with her. Not very well, I might add, but uh I do enjoy it, and I think if I was on the island there were times when I'd feel like singing.

Marti Webb5:17

Mm.

Speaker 25:29

Believe are the children.

Speaker 25:38

Da-da-da-da-da-da.

Presenter6:17

Maria Callas singing Una Voce Pocofar from Rossine's The Barber of Seville.

Presenter6:23

Right, so you burned your satchel, and left school, and were out in the world.

Presenter6:27

Stop the World I Want to Get Off. That was Anthony Newly, wasn't it? That's right, yes. Did you have a lot to do in the show?

Marti Webb6:33

Yes, I did. I I was the sort of the leader of the girls and I was always with Tony. I did lumbered with him a number and uh

Marti Webb6:39

I was always like his conscience, telling him when people died or what had happened and things like that. It was a little part.

Presenter6:44

Oh yes, I remember.

Presenter6:46

So at sixteen you were a West End actress. How long did that show run?

Marti Webb6:50

It ran about twenty months, I think.

Marti Webb6:52

Altogether?'Cause Tony left and um Anna left Anna Quayle who was in it with him.

Presenter6:53

Yeah.

Marti Webb6:56

And we had Thelma Ruby and Tony Tanner.

Presenter6:59

Yeah.

Marti Webb6:59

Take over.

Presenter7:00

Well, that was a nice long run to start with.

Marti Webb7:01

It was, yes. Started me off, yes.

Presenter7:03

What happened next?

Marti Webb7:05

After Stop the World, oh I went to Ipswich to do a pantomime.

Presenter7:08

Yes.

Marti Webb7:09

That was Aladdin, and I played Princess Valrubinor not very successfully, I might add.

Presenter7:11

Not very sick.

Presenter7:13

Not successfully.

Marti Webb7:14

No, I think I did the fastest rendition of And This Is My Beloved you've ever heard.'Cause I don't think the kids really want to hear the Princess singing very much. I think they want to get her off and get Widow Twankie on.

Presenter7:24

What was your next West End engagement?

Marti Webb7:26

Have Six Months with Tommy Steele.

Presenter7:27

Oh, of course, you played opposite, Tommy.

Marti Webb7:29

That's right.

Presenter7:30

That must have done a lot to establish you.

Marti Webb7:32

I think it did actually. I was very young. I think I was only just nineteen when I did that. And uh it was a great break for me. It was a wonderful role. I mean it was a nice acting role as well as a good singing role.

Presenter7:42

And another nice long run.

Marti Webb7:43

Yes. Again, I think that was about twenty months too. And then they took the show to Broadway.

Presenter7:47

Did you go with it?

Marti Webb7:48

Now I stayed here.

Presenter7:50

and with a broken heart,

Marti Webb7:51

No, not really. I think you take it with a pinch of salt. I didn't go with Salt the World, either.

Presenter7:55

Mm-hmm.

Marti Webb7:55

So, um

Presenter7:56

Two shows with a twenty-month run. That's a pretty good start. Let's have your third record now.

Marti Webb8:02

Yes, this is Julian Lloyd Webber playing the Swan.

Marti Webb8:06

And um I chose this because I think every little girl have always wanted to dance the swan. It's one of those things. And I know I used to do this all the time when I was a little girl, dance to this. And I think for me it's all the ballet music that I would want, you know. I mean I thought of all different ballets that I could have.

Marti Webb8:20

And I'd kept chucking them out, chucking them out, and I came down with the swarm, which I thought would be ideal.

Presenter9:25

Julian Lightwebber playing The Swan by Saint Sans

Presenter9:29

So you had had this first-class success in half a six months. What cropped up next?

Marti Webb9:35

After house for six months. Oh, um well, I had a lean period and then I did a summer season in Blackpool with Thora Hurd and Freddie Frinton for a while.

Presenter9:42

Yeah.

Marti Webb9:44

But that was lovely. No music though, unfortunately.

Presenter9:46

Have you done a lot of straight work?

Marti Webb9:48

No, that's the only thing I've ever done, without music.

Presenter9:51

Then what happened?

Marti Webb9:52

Then I got Nancy and Oliver, the tour, the first national tour of that, and that was very exciting. I suppose I enjoyed that.

Presenter9:58

Who was Fagan?

Marti Webb9:59

Oh, the first Vagin I had was Richard Easton, who made a big hit with the Brothers series on television.

Marti Webb10:05

We did that for I think it was fifteen months on tour and then we came into London to the Piccadilly Theatre. We ran for another year and that was with Barry Humphreys as Vegas. Barry Humphreys?

Presenter10:13

Surprise, I didn't know he had played Fagin. I'd love to have seen that.

Marti Webb10:16

I know, he's very good. A lot of people say that. They're quite surprised. Because he was the original mister Sowbury.

Presenter10:21

Boom.

Marti Webb10:21

In Oliver.

Marti Webb10:23

So he had done it before,'cause he understood Vague, and went to Broadway with it.

Presenter10:26

Then what?

Marti Webb10:27

After that I didn't do much actually, then I went on a ship.

Presenter10:30

On shipware to?

Marti Webb10:30

Okay.

Marti Webb10:31

Sounds very grand. I cruised round the Caribbean from New York on a Greek liner and um I was Soubrette, that sort of singer dancer in the on the ship in the entertainments. And uh it was lovely'cause it gave me a chance to see all the Caribbean islands and South America.

Marti Webb10:47

And then we went back to Gibraltar and Greece and Malta, so it was really nice. I had a great time.

Presenter10:52

How long did this take?

Marti Webb10:53

A year. I was wondering.

Presenter10:54

A year cruising round the Caribbean and whatever.

Presenter10:57

Marvellous

Marti Webb10:58

Mm.

Presenter10:58

And the show. Was that the same show you played?

Marti Webb11:00

No, we used to do different shows. We had uh I think there was about ten shows we had in all and we do them for different cruises'cause you have different uh length of cruises. You have three, five, seven, ten day, eleven day, twelve day cruises, different cruises. And you go to different islands on different cruises. So it wasn't boring'cause you didn't go to the same island all the time. So it was uh quite fascinating.

Presenter11:19

You came back with a good suntan.

Marti Webb11:21

I did. It took me a long time to adjust to the British winters again.

Presenter11:25

Yeah.

Marti Webb11:26

And he did.

Presenter11:26

Or what was happening in the London theatre when you got back?

Marti Webb11:29

Well, um nothing much actually when I first got back,'cause I'd been away for a year, as I said, so that was out of sight, out of mind. And then a friend of mine said, Oh, you should come back into the work and I said, Oh, nobody will remember me, and uh his agent did, and she sent me for a job which was Godspell, which I got.

Presenter11:44

Constable. That was um a rock biblical show, wasn't it?

Marti Webb11:48

That's right, yes. And we were at the roundhouse first, then we transferred to Wyndham's.

Presenter11:51

How long for?

Marti Webb11:52

The show itself ran for three years, and I was only in it for eighteen months.

Presenter11:58

What did you play?

Marti Webb11:59

Well, we didn't have any names, we were just the disciples, but the song I sung was Bless the Lord.

Presenter12:03

Mm.

Marti Webb12:04

There were ten of us in all, including David Essex and Julie Cuffington. And it's funny how everyone's sort of gone on from that. And Jeremy Irons, of course.

Presenter12:07

Yeah.

Presenter12:10

Well, that's quite a good curse and four good names to put up in lights there.

Marti Webb12:11

Yeah, yeah.

Marti Webb12:14

Yeah.

Marti Webb12:15

Yeah, so it's amazing.

Presenter12:17

Record number four.

Marti Webb12:18

Ah, yes, now this is O Happy Day by the Edwin Hawkinsingers, and I used to hear this a lot when I was on the island, and that's the first time I heard it.

Marti Webb12:26

And I just I just love it. I just think it's great. I love gospel singing anyway and um I think it's a very happy record and I think that would make me feel good.

Presenter12:33

A happy day

Presenter12:37

Oh happy day happy day

Presenter12:41

When Jesus wore

Marti Webb12:45

Uh Uh

Presenter12:45

Oh, Winnie War.

Marti Webb12:47

See you in the last

Speaker 212:49

When Jesus wore

Marti Webb12:52

Jesus Morgan.

Speaker 212:52

Watch my trees away happy day, happy day

Presenter13:02

O Happy Day by the Edwin Hawkins Singers

Presenter13:06

What was your next West English?

Marti Webb13:07

Well the card with Jim Dale and Millicent Martin.

Presenter13:10

That was from the Arnold Bennett story.

Marti Webb13:12

That's right, yes. We did that at Bristol, and then came into town to the Queen's theatre.

Marti Webb13:16

We ran about six months.

Presenter13:17

All plain sailing.

Marti Webb13:18

Except for one night actually, which I'll never forget, I was standing on a desk with Jim Dale and we were looking

Marti Webb13:25

We were looking through the window behind the desk. We were supposed to be watching the Countess of Chell.

Marti Webb13:31

I was played by Diana Sheridan at the time, just walking across, and suddenly we realized that the piece of scenery which was like a flat, which is a flat piece of wood which is done to look like the wall, decided to move.

Marti Webb13:42

So Jim and I both put our hands out and grabbed it and pulled it back.

Marti Webb13:46

I don't think the audience saw it, but everyone standing in the wings did, and everyone started laughing a lot. And it was a very funny moment, but it was so instant the way we just put our hands out and grabbed it and pulled it back.

Presenter13:55

Okay.

Marti Webb13:55

It was about to fall.

Presenter13:55

Yeah.

Presenter13:56

Well, after Arnold Bennett you were in a JB Priestly show.

Marti Webb13:59

That's right, the good companions.

Presenter14:01

That was a a last-minute job, wasn't it?

Marti Webb14:03

That's right. I took over at the last minute and um I had four days to learn it.

Presenter14:07

Where did it open?

Marti Webb14:09

In Manchester, and it already opened when I went up to Manchester, so

Presenter14:09

And it already

Marti Webb14:12

I had four days to learn, and I did about three performances there before it closed and came down to town.

Presenter14:16

You played Susie Dean.

Marti Webb14:17

That's right, yes.

Presenter14:18

Who's the leading lady in the Dinky Doos, isn't he?

Marti Webb14:20

That's right. Yes. I love that name, don't you, the Dinky Doos. And um yes, and so and then we had a week out where we learnt some more numbers and I still don't think I knew what I was doing when we opened and it took me a couple of months really to get into it.

Marti Webb14:33

There beans are many there.

Presenter14:33

There have been so many versions of The Good Companions, whose music was in this one.

Marti Webb14:35

To me

Marti Webb14:37

Andrei Previn, and the book was by Ronald Harwood.

Presenter14:39

A long run?

Marti Webb14:41

No, we there again we only ran about six months, at Her Majesty's.

Marti Webb14:44

I think the people liked it who came to see it, but we were we were hit by the bombs at that time most of the London theatres were.

Marti Webb14:50

And, um, you know, you can't really blame people for not wanting to bring their children in or coming in from the suburbs. And somehow I think it killed

Speaker 214:54

Coming for the

Marti Webb14:57

that trade, and I I don't know if will it ever come back really?

Marti Webb15:01

It is um a bit difficult for people to come in now, once they stop doing it.

Marti Webb15:04

They don't feel like coming in to see the shows any more. Whereas people used to come in much more.

Presenter15:09

What's it was

Marti Webb15:09

Of course it was easier for them.

Marti Webb15:11

I think the chains are better, and it was also much cheaper.

Presenter15:13

Now you followed that with a show called The Great American Musical, which I don't remember at all.

Marti Webb15:18

Well, it only ran for a short time at the Regent Poly in Regent Street, which is not usually a theatre, it's a cinema anyway. And it was just a six-hander.

Presenter15:22

Which is not

Marti Webb15:27

But it was a great fun to do. It was a lovely show. We all enjoyed it that we're in it. It was a little pastige thing on uh Hollywood musicals really.

Presenter15:34

Now, whenever you've found time for it, you've enjoyed working at the Players' Theatre Club, with that lovely old time music hall show, which has been running now I suppose it must be about forty years.

Marti Webb15:43

I think it's even longer than that, I think, since it started,'cause they started in Albemarle Street, I think, before they went to the Doctor.

Presenter15:49

They started in Covent Garden before Albert House.

Marti Webb15:51

Yeah, so I mean it's it's ages. I don't know how long it is really.

Presenter15:54

What sort of numbers do you do?

Marti Webb15:55

Well, I do musical numbers, of course. My main number is um Sing Us One of the Old Songs, George, which is a lovely old song, about um an old musical artist who's ill.

Marti Webb16:05

and can't sing and he goes on the stage and the audience of course say to him, Sing us one of the old songs, George and his little daughter comes on and saves the night by singing for him.

Speaker 216:10

Hmm.

Marti Webb16:14

And it's it's it's a lovely song, and it goes down very well usually.

Presenter16:17

Yes, all those old songs are well worth reviving.

Marti Webb16:20

Hmm.

Presenter16:21

Well, would you like to revive one now? What's your fifth record?

Marti Webb16:23

Yeah.

Marti Webb16:24

Far removed, I think, from the Players' Theatre. It's um Derek and the Dominoes with Leila, who is Eric Captain. I've just always loved this record. I just love the the way it changes. And um it's just a great record, I think.

Presenter17:07

Layla by Derrick and the Dominoes

Presenter17:10

You've done quite a lot of television, haven't you?

Marti Webb17:12

Yes, I have actually now, and only in the later years, not in the beginning, that's for sure.

Presenter17:17

There was a television series you did called The Songwriters which was rather useful to you, I think.

Marti Webb17:22

Yes, it was, actually. From it I think I got Evita. In this series I I met someone called Angela Richards, who I'm sure people realise from Secret Army and who's now in Cats playing Grizzella. She suggested me to a friend of hers, Gary Bond, who was then playing Shea Guevara in Evita, to take over from Elaine.

Marti Webb17:39

And then he in turn suggested me to Andrew Lloyd Webber and Hal Prince. From that I got an audition and they decided to put me in as Elaine's replacement. As a vita.

Presenter17:48

As Evita, the title role eponymous heroine.

Marti Webb17:52

Yes. Oh, yes, not so popular at the moment, I believe.

Presenter17:55

And uh you played it on Broadway as well.

Marti Webb17:59

No, actually that's where I actually auditioned was on Broadway. So it was rather strange'cause I never auditioned for the show originally and when this all came up they flew me out to New York to Hal because Hal was so busy with Sweeney Todd, which was about to open any minute. And so um I went out there and I actually sung on Broadway'cause I sung in the Eurus Theatre, which was quite amazing with this man sweeping the stage behind me as he was setting up for the the night's performance. So at least I've stood on Broadway and sung.

Speaker 218:16

Yeah.

Presenter18:16

But

Presenter18:21

I've stood on.

Presenter18:24

And how long did you play it in London?

Marti Webb18:25

For two years.

Presenter18:26

Good job.

Marti Webb18:27

Yes, because I did a month first of all for Elaine and then I did the two a week until um I took over myself. Yes, two performances a week, which was Hal wanted me to do, to just to keep my hand in so I'd be all right there with the costume change, everyone would get used to me. And it was very useful actually when I eventually took over. And since then they've done that with every cover now, because Stephanie, who was my cover for twice a week.

Presenter18:32

I took a moment.

Speaker 218:42

Anyway

Marti Webb18:49

Now he's playing Evita. I think it does give you an idea to get yourself together to do it.

Presenter18:51

Okay.

Presenter18:54

And then you went to opera at last.

Presenter18:56

She went to the English opera company.

Marti Webb18:57

Yeah.

Marti Webb18:59

Yes, yes. Not singing Grand Opera, I might add. Yes, in Seven Deadly Sings, Mike ah, yes.

Presenter19:04

Did you enjoy that?

Marti Webb19:05

Yes, I did. Yes, I did. I I just wished it had been um more consecutive, the performances.

Marti Webb19:10

So I did nine over a month.

Presenter19:11

But you had been used to playing twice a week in Evita, so y you had been broken in for that.

Marti Webb19:12

You have to do it.

Marti Webb19:16

Yes, but some of them were just once a week towards the end, which was very strange. And especially as the piece is only thirty-five minutes long. What was it possible?

Presenter19:22

What was it put on with?

Marti Webb19:24

Mama de Teresa.

Presenter19:25

Oh, yes.

Marti Webb19:26

Poula. Yes, I used to stay and watch that because I used to quite enjoy watching the second part.

Presenter19:30

We've got to record number six.

Marti Webb19:32

Ah, yes. Uh, this is Simon and Garfunkel doing Bridge Over Troubled Water.

Marti Webb19:36

Which uh I think is such a great produced record anyway and um it means a lot to me, this record. Belong Silver Girl.

Marti Webb19:47

Say along.

Presenter19:52

Your time has come.

Presenter19:56

To shine

Presenter19:59

All your dreams are on their way.

Presenter20:06

See Outlation

Presenter20:12

Simon and Garfunkel.

Presenter20:14

Your current occupation, Marty? A very unusual show, Song and Dance. Tell me about it.

Marti Webb20:20

Uh well it's as the title suggests a song and dance. The first half is song, which is me, and um it's based on my album and television show, Tell Me on a Sunday. We've put some extra songs in it. Andrew Lloyd Weber and Don Black have written some new songs and um changed a few lyrics. And uh the second half is Dance, which is Variations.

Marti Webb20:41

with Wayne Sleep and a company of um eight dancers.

Presenter20:44

So you've got the whole of the first half about an hour.

Marti Webb20:46

Yes.

Presenter20:47

And all these songs connect into a story.

Marti Webb20:50

Yes. In actual fact, I go through I think it's uh one, two, three affairs in the course of the evening. Rather fast worker. But um

Marti Webb21:01

Yes, and um it's just uh really basically just talking to the audience and having a conversation with them most of the time about the situations in your life. It's rather like if you talk to a mirror or whatever, and I write letters home to my mother.

Presenter21:10

Hmm.

Marti Webb21:14

and describe what's going on in my life.

Presenter21:17

Now that's rather a pill for eight performances a week, isn't it?

Marti Webb21:21

It is, but I found them very enjoyable because the audiences are so warm and they're so nice, they make it a joy.

Marti Webb21:27

Every now and then I think it's rather daunting when I first go on there thinking, Oh God, am I going to be right for an hour?

Marti Webb21:32

But you don't feel it so now when you're out there. I hope the audience doesn't either. But uh

Marti Webb21:36

It doesn't feel an owl when I'm there.

Presenter21:38

Well, that's going to keep you happy for a while. What would you like to happen next?

Marti Webb21:43

Oh, I don't know.

Marti Webb21:44

I never try and think of that, because I might be disappointed. I like just to see what happens, see which way the wind blows me, really.

Marti Webb21:52

Right.

Presenter21:52

Uh

Presenter21:53

Record number seven.

Marti Webb21:54

Oh yes, and this is David Bowie, and it's called Space Oddity, just'cause I like it. I've always liked David Bowie, and it was difficult to choose one track. Again, with most of these records I found it very difficult the choice, but I've chosen this one because I I really do like it.

Marti Webb22:09

For here am I sitting in a tin can.

Presenter22:24

Planet Earth is blue and there's nothing I can do.

Presenter22:39

David Barry, Space Oddity. Marty, are you an open air girl?

Marti Webb22:44

Yes, I think I am. I do like fresh air, I must admit.

Presenter22:46

We went for a girl guide.

Marti Webb22:48

No.

Presenter22:48

Pity. Could you look after yourself on a desert island?

Marti Webb22:52

I'd have to, really. I've got no choice.

Presenter22:54

Are you handy about the place? Could you rig up a shelter?

Marti Webb22:57

Yes, I think I could. I think it's survival, isn't it? I mean, if you're going to have to do something, you're going to do it. You're not going to sit there and either freeze to death or boil in the sun. I mean, you're going to do something about it. And there are lots of things on an island that you would find useful to make a shelter, that's for sure.

Presenter23:12

Have you ever done anything useful like uh fishing?

Marti Webb23:14

No, I haven't.

Marti Webb23:16

I haven't, I must admit. I don't really like anything where you can kill something. I must admit, I'm.

Marti Webb23:21

bit like that, although I'm not a vegetarian in any way.

Presenter23:23

Could you um cultivate?

Marti Webb23:25

Yes, I think I could do that, because I like plants and I have quite a few plants of my own in the ground.

Presenter23:29

Are you a good cook?

Marti Webb23:30

Not a bad cook.

Presenter23:31

Would you try to escape?

Presenter23:33

A big rock.

Marti Webb23:34

Yes, I suppose I would. I don't know. I suppose one could try.

Presenter23:37

Would you have any idea which way to go? From the stars or from the moon or

Marti Webb23:42

Well, the sun rises in one place and sets in the other, so I would work that out. But I mean it all depends on what sea you are.

Marti Webb23:49

If one was in the Pacific or the Indian Ocean or somewhere like that, then you'd have an idea more or less where land would be. Otherwise you'd go completely in the wrong direction and just keep going. Find yourself in worse trouble than if you stayed on the island.

Presenter23:59

Yes. Well, your year of cruising must have taught you a lot of geography.

Presenter24:04

What's your last record?

Marti Webb24:05

Uh my last record oh well

Marti Webb24:07

This is the Goons, actually. It was a toss up between the Goons and Hancock, and the Goons won. And then, of course, the difficulty was choosing a Goon track, and I've chosen this one because I it always makes me laugh. They all make me laugh most of the time, but this one there's just something silly about this, and it's the dreaded batter pudding hurler of Bexilon Sea.

Speaker 224:26

Why, only twenty-eight miles across the Channel, the Germans are watching this coast.

Speaker 424:30

Don't you be a silly pilly policeman. Bravo, Henry. Pittle piddle poo. Pittle poo.

Speaker 424:37

They they they they they they can't see a little match being struck?

Speaker 224:41

No, all right.

Speaker 224:49

Any questions?

Speaker 424:52

Yes, where are my legs?

Presenter24:56

A Goon Show Classic, an excerpt from the dreaded batter pudding hurler of Beck's Hill on Sea, originally broadcast in October, nineteen fifty four.

Presenter25:05

Marty, if you could only take one disc out of the H you've played us, which would it be?

Marti Webb25:09

That's very difficult. Again, it's bad enough having eight, but I think I choose the goons, actually.

Presenter25:14

Right, don't blame you. And one luxury, one object of no practical use, that you'll enjoy to have on the island.

Marti Webb25:22

It will be slightly practical, actually. I don't know if it sneaks in. That's a piano.

Presenter25:26

Oh, that's all right, an upright piano.

Marti Webb25:28

Yes,'cause then I could pick out maybe all the tunes that I haven't got, so I could only have eight.

Presenter25:28

Because then I'll

Presenter25:34

Right. How is your piano playing?

Marti Webb25:36

Not very good, so maybe I'd learn to be a better pianist.

Presenter25:38

You can play without music.

Marti Webb25:40

No, I had to read music, so I mean I can remember some tunes, of course, that I've learnt, but I don't play by ear.

Presenter25:46

We'll give you some music in the stool.

Marti Webb25:48

Oh, thank you.

Presenter25:49

and one book apart from the Bible and Shakespeare, which are already provided.

Marti Webb25:52

Well, I'd like an illustrated dictionary, actually.

Presenter25:55

Mm.

Marti Webb25:56

Because um

Marti Webb25:57

I feel that uh one thing that would annoy me is if I was searching for a word or something and I couldn't find it. So if I have a dictionary I can look them up. Plus I like crossword puzzles. Maybe I'll start devising crossword puzzles or something or just writing, if I can find any writing material there.

Presenter26:09

Goodbye.

Presenter26:11

In the sand?

Marti Webb26:12

Yes, better than nothing.

Presenter26:14

And thank you, Marty Webb, for letting us hear your Desert Island Discs.

Marti Webb26:18

Thank you.

Presenter26:19

Goodbye, everyone.

Speaker 226:28

You've been listening to a podcast from the Desert Island Discs archive. For more podcasts, please visit bbc.co.uk slash radio four.